relationship

13 simple things to make your man happy
13 simple things to make your man happy 1354 437 Galia Brener

 

I’m glad that I decided to write about this topic, because once again, I realized how easy it is to make men happy. Mon Dieu, they are so much less complicated than us women! It’s incredible how little they need to feel happy and loved. Give your man a blowjob, feed him and give him space to do his things, and he’ll be the happiest creature on Earth! Well, it’s not “quite” as easy as that ladies, but definitely not much more difficult either.

All the men that I have interviewed said more or less the same thing. The answers were very down to earth, and it didn’t seem like anyone needed something strange or appalling to make him happy. It makes me very glad to see that most men are happy with simple and doable actions that any woman can do to make her guy happy. Please note that none of them said they need a woman who works a lot, earns tons of money or buys him expensive gifts. No at all, they need a good woman to listen to them and show that she cares. Ladies if you follow these 13 simple things, you will have a very happy and grateful man by your side:

1. Blowjobs and sex. Don’t forget that men connect intimately and physically.
2. Be supportive.
3. Be a good listener, and show him that you are loyal and care.
4. Give him a massage when he’s tired.
5. Always be honest and truthful.
6. Be funny and show your sense of humor.
7. Give him space for his own things and friends.
8. Be happy and this will make him happy too! Ever hear of the saying “Happy wife, happy life?” It’s true, and your positivity will rub off on him too.
9. Surprises – like a cute note, small present, nice lingerie, and special dinner – cook something delicious for him.
10. Do sports together.
11. Stay sexy – don’t let yourself go.
12. Take interest in his hobby – and offer to do it together.
13. Emotional stability. Men don’t want, need or like drama.

This reminds me of Heather’s story. 5 years ago she met a guy and everything started off so well. The first few months were like living in a dream. They didn’t get out of bed for weeks, and she never had so many orgasms in her entire life before. They did lots of things together and really enjoyed each other’s company. But after the initial “Flowers, sex & chocolate” phase ended, reality set in, and Heather showed her egoistic side. Not only did she stop making herself look pretty when they met, but she stopped her effort all together. She told me that she hardly even had sex with him anymore, and didn’t bother doing small things to make him happy. After almost a year, he gave up as well, and the relationship became horrible. The fights began and the drama was out of control. The insane part was that she still loved him very much, but made no effort! I told her to start doing things to make him happy, but her answer was, “What has he done for me lately?!” It was a pure selfish power struggle between the two, and the end was very near. He was a good man, and Heather really regrets the breakup, crying that she could have done more to make him happy! He really didn’t ask for much, but Heather was unfortunately too selfish at the time to see that.

From my own experience, when a man is happy and gets what he needs from his woman, he is very open, pleased and even eager to give back. A good man will always show his appreciation. He sees, and more importantly feels when a woman really loves him and wants to make him happy. Besides, look at those easy 13 points, they are really not asking for too much. My dear ladies, it’s time for us to give back to our sweethearts and make an effort to keep them happy. The good ones definitely deserve it.

Sex on the first date?
Sex on the first date? 640 250 Galia Brener

We live in an age where traditions have become weaker, rules are not important and anything goes. Sleeping around is not so drastic anymore. Or is it? I have asked many of my male friends what their opinion was on this matter. I was very surprised that 75% of them said that they would rather wait with a girl that they really like, rather than jumping into bed right away with her. Most of them answered: No sex on the first date!

Here are the reasons why the men said “No”:

1. If she sleeps with me on the first date, she probable does that same with all the other men as well. I don’t want to have a girlfriend like that.

2. If you get sex right away, there is nothing left to top it off on the next dates.

3. We are hunters and need a challenge! We want to work for the cookie, and not get it easily right away. There’s no fun or excitement in that.

4. If I really like the girl, then I prefer to get to know her first. This builds up the passion and feelings.

5. This shows she respects herself, and I respect her even more for that.

Wow ladies, now that’s what I call some honest answers. Hope is not completely lost – there are still men out there with a gentleman-like outlook on life that are looking for true love and not just fast sex. This is very encouraging for us!

This brings me to Ambrosia’s story. She met a guy at the gym. He is average height, has dark thick hair and ice-colored blue eyes. He’s been flirting with her for a while now, and two weeks ago he finally made his move and asked her out. She agreed and was quite excited because she was very attracted to him. He took her out for a very nice dinner and show. After they went for drinks and had a perfect evening. She called me from the bathroom and asked if she should take him home with her. My gut feeling told me – No! I advised her to let him walk her to the door, thank him for a wonderful evening, allow him to kiss her, give him a tight hug, smile warmly and go upstairs – alone. She didn’t listen to me and took him home. They drank more upstairs, got drunk and had wild sex. Starting upstairs, the date lost its perfect magical feeling, and was more about the sex. They both enjoyed it very much, but surprise surprise; he didn’t call for days after. He sent her an sms 5 days later, saying he was busy. She summoned up the courage to ask why he was behaving so coldly all of a sudden. No joke, this is what he replied, “Ambrosia, you’re a fun girl, and we had a wild night. But I’m looking for something more serious.” She was shocked. She told him that she also wants something serious, and he said, “Do you do the same thing with every man you go out with on the first night – calling this your serious intention?” Ok I have to admit, the guy seems like a jerk, and used the situation, however it does show that she left a wrong impression on him.

Most men will jump at a chance to sleep with you on the first date, but are willing to wait if they really like you. Sure there are some couples that get together after sex on the first date, and even end up getting married – but the percent is much lower to those that actually take the time to get to know each other first.

Another thing the guys told me was that if he disappears after the first dates without sex and doesn’t stay around to get to know you better, than he was only after the sex. You don’t need such a man always. Ciao and next! Waiting to have sex is a wonderful and natural way of selection to see who is really into you, and who only wants your body for a few nights. Waiting with sex also allows you to build up feelings for the person, which will intensify the first sexual encounter and make it even more phenomenal. Sex with feeling is the best, even on the first time!

I agree with the guys that I interviewed, because in my opinion, I always like to get to know the man before. We live in a world where everything is rushed – and patience is almost nonexistent – so why not work against this system and take the time to get to know this new person in our life? What’s with this insane haste to have sex? Maybe this seems like old-fashioned to you, but why not go back to the courting era where dating actually meant something special, and not just getting into her panties? I see nothing wrong with letting the man romance us first. Going out for dinners and talking into the late night hours – learning to feel for this person, before jumping into bed – is such a nice luxury these days, so why not allow ourselves the time to enjoy this luxury? Most of the men told me that at the beginning, mental stimulation separates the woman who will simply become a sex affair or their next girlfriend. If you’re interested in the man for just a sex fling then go ahead, jump his bones. But for something serious, please take your time. It’s worth the wait and he will respect you even more for it.

Addicted to love!
Addicted to love! 1354 437 Galia Brener

Love, like sex and drugs can become a serious addiction. There’s a simple explanation for this. When you fall in love, your brain releases endorphins, which is the feel-good chemical that is responsible for making you very happy. These wonderful chemicals give us a feeling of euphoria – a natural high! They also suppress hunger, which explains why we are not so hungry when we first fall in love. Eventually the normal daily grind starts, and the love is not so new and thrilling anymore. The rush is gone, or even worse, if the couple breaks up, what happens then? The brain and body desperately want that high again, and this can lead to making bad decisions. Can it be that we are addicted to the “feeling” of love?

Love is very nice to have, but if you are single at the moment, does that mean that you cannot be the happiest that you can ever be? Nothing is certain in life – you might meet your future partner tomorrow, or in one year, but what should you do in the mean time? Sit depressed at home, wishing for someone to hug and kiss you? No, Definitely not! This addiction to the feeling of love is very dangerous for two main reasons:

Reason 1: the brain equates that love = happiness. Meaning, if you have no (romantic) love in your life, then you are not happy. What a horribly depressive thought! Unfortunately this has been so deeply engraved into some people’s minds and hearts, that they cannot eliminate it anymore.

Reason 2: some people will end up taking the next best thing that comes along, in order not to be alone. Why make such a huge compromise and take someone that you know is not good enough for you, simply to have someone beside you? I always say that it’s better to be single than with an idiot.

My friend Heather was a woman that equated her happiness with having a man in her life. If she was single, then her world was not so pink anymore. She had times when she felt sad and lonely, and even slightly depressed. She walked around the city, especially in the cold wintertime, and saw all the couples holding hands, and kissing, and she wanted to have that so desperately. She cried many times to me how much she missed a man and love in her life. After a few years of being single, she realized that she couldn’t wait until the next man came along to finally feel happy again. She had to change her thinking ASAP! Her therapist said that she had to introduce other things into her life, apart from love, which fulfilled her and made her happy. She had to trigger those damn endorphins in a new way, and not depend on the addiction to love anymore! When Heather finally changed her thinking, many people who haven’t seen her in a while asked, “Do you have a new love? You look so relaxed and happy!” she now laughs in return and says, “Since when is having a partner the only thing that dictates a person’s happiness in life?”

Thankfully, there are other things that trigger that “happy feeling” you get when first falling in love. For example:

1. Do a vigorous workout, and your body will be happily exhausted. You will get the “runner’s high” and be completely satisfied after.

2. Eating a bit of dark chocolate during the day does wonders for the feeling of happiness.

3. Take ginseng everyday. It works well to release endorphins.

4. Find reasons to laugh. Watch a funny show or go to a comedy club.

5. Eat something spicy! Chili peppers release endorphins.

6. Shopping helps as well. No need to spend a fortune, but treat yourself to something nice once in a while.

7. Masturbation makes you happy. No partner? No problem! Nothing wrong with grabbing your vibrator, having a nice orgasm to start the day and enhancing your happiness!

8. Hobbies are a great way to spend time with yourself and doing what makes YOU happy.

9. Get your shit done and don’t procrastinate with important things! The less weight and worries you have on your shoulders, the happier you will be!

As you can see, being addicted to love and having your happiness depend on it can be quite dangerous. Take your mind off the need and addiction of “having to have” love, and start taking care of yourself. I know that there are so many things that you could be doing for yourself right now in order to make you feel happy. Life is happening right NOW, and there is no point of thinking of happiness in the future – when you finally have that love again! Live now. Enjoy now – regardless if you have that love in your life or not! The best part is that when you are busy doing those other things, your true love will come and surprise you when you least expect it…

You’re having an affair?
You’re having an affair? 514 193 Galia Brener
We live in a world where things move faster than the speed of light – unfortunately sometimes, even love as well. Values are being replaced with smartphones, and morals are sniffed up the nose in forms of white powders. Wives cheat on Tinder, and husbands run to prostitutes. What is left from the old-fashioned thing, once called “true love”? I’m sure you have all heard of horror stories about affairs amongst your friends, or have seen it in movies. So I ask myself, how many of those cheating affairs actually have a happy ending?

My friend Gloria met a man two years ago. “B-Liar” was exceptionally handsome, tall with dark blond hair and piercing blue eyes. He was very charming, and quite the smooth operator. He was flawless, and even more beautiful than the painting of Dorian Gray. Oscar Wilde would do flips in the air if he saw B-Liar. He was quite generous, and invited Gloria on a holiday the first month they met. She noticed that he always put his phone face down on the table, and kept it on silent or closed most of the time. She didn’t think much of it, only that he was trying to spend quality time with her, without interruptions. Yeah right. When they came back, he spent many wonderful evenings in her flat, but always left early in the morning and never had much time on the weekends for her – saying that he’s busy, or must work at the office during the weekend. He also never took her to his flat – making an excuse that it’s being renovated, and that he lives in a hotel at the “moment”. The months passed by and she was already very deeply in love with him. She said, “Gali, I know that he’s the one! I feel it so deep inside, I’m sure of it!”

One evening, I was at the beautiful Christmas market in Frankfurt, enjoying a hot warm glass of Feuerzangenbowle with the girls. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mr. B-Liar walk by, hugging Gloria. As I was approaching them from behind, I saw that they started kissing very passionately in front of the Christmas tree. I was so happy for my dear Gloria. Being the silly monkey that I am, I jumped on her and gave her a huge bear hug from behind. What happened next was the shock of a lifetime for me! She turned around, and it was not Gloria! She looked at me like I just dropped down form the moon, and I accidentally spilled my entire Feuerzangenbowle on B-Liar. He introduced her as his wife, and I was shocked and speechless! He looked very scared and begged me with his eyes not to say anything. His wife was very confused, and I realized it was time to make my exit. I told the girls I have to leave, and went straight to Gloria’s flat. I felt so miserable. How the hell should I tell my good friend such horrendous news, when she thinks he’s the one? I bought a bottle of Belvedere on the way, because I knew this would be a tough evening for my poor sweet darling.

I told Gloria that B-Liar is married. It hurt me so much to see the gruesome pain settle in her eyes and heart. It was a gut-wrenching night, one of the worst I’ve ever had. I have never heard someone cry with so much agony. How could he have hidden it for so many months from her? Of course he tried to blind her with the usual, “I don’t love her anymore, and we don’t have sex at all. It’s too expensive to get a divorce at the moment. I will leave her soon, you’re the only one for me. I love you so much baby” bullshit! However, Gloria loved him to death, and couldn’t let him go. He showered her with promises to leave his wife. She waited and waited, and wanted him even more. She cries often now, and happiness has not visited her heart for a while. She is living on standby. It’s horrific to see my friend so broken! I tell her to leave him, and stop this insanity at once! But she doesn’t, because he promised to be with her. Well, it’s been almost two years now and nothing has changed. Gloria is the other woman. His promises are empty, and only fuel her false hope of a happy future together. But like with most affair cases, he will never leave his family.

Ladies, and also gentlemen – it happens often the other way around as well – please save yourself the excruciating pain, and don’t get involved with a married person. Very rarely do these people leave their partners for their lovers. And if they do, there is a huge chance that s/he will cheat on you as well – once a cheater, always a cheater. Besides, you don’t want to be that bitch who broke up a family and brought evil into someone’s life. This is bad karma – and you don’t want to mess with that. I read somewhere that karma-wise, if you have and affair with a married person, the same can come back to you later on, and your future partner might have an affair as well. That’s horrible, and you don’t need this to happen to you. There are enough single people out there these days for us. If you are dating someone and didn’t know about this, like Gloria, my advice would be to stop the affair right away. Sure you will miss them, and feel pain for a while, but it’s a pain with an end, rather than being stuck in an affair with endless pain. You will eventually get over it and move on. If you stay in the affair, you will block your possibility of finding true love with someone that can actually be yours! No good comes out of affairs, and almost all of them have a very bitter ending. Life is short, is that what you wish for yourself? Make yourself available for the one who will be “your” sweetheart. Don’t you deserve the best?

Web: www.facebook.com/yesnomaybegalia

Galia Brener on RTL Explosiv – 08.09.2014
Galia Brener on RTL Explosiv – 08.09.2014 1354 437 Galia Brener

Here is my honest opinion regarding the Bachelorette’s love. I wish them all the best and lots of luck for their new love! :-) Interview at the Night of the Stars 2014.

Deal with your shit!
Deal with your shit! 1354 437 Galia Brener

Wouldn’t is be so nice to run away from all of your problems and pretend they simply don’t exist? Or imagine making a beautiful black wooden box, filling it up with all of your problems, and then burying it somewhere in the woods, or maybe even burning the box – and POOF, like magic – your problems are gone? Dream on. Unless you deal head on with your problems, they will not disappear. In fact, if you ignore or push them away, they will sneak up on you and hunt you down when you least expect it!

My very good friend Tony is experiencing this problem right now. He and his ex girlfriend broke up about half a year ago. She was and always will be his only true love. He told me many times that she is his soul mate, and he could always be himself only around her. He often told her “I feel at home with you, and you are my family.” She never judged him, and always supported his goals and path in life. He was able to let the child in him out around her, and he felt truly loved and understood only by her. To make a long story short, they broke up for reasons I cannot mention. For him it was like a huge piece of his heart was ripped out of his body, and he was hurting very deeply after the breakup. For her the pain was even more intense. However, both dealt with it in completely different ways. She cried her heart out for months, did lots of sports, got into amazing shape, developed her new business and worked out through the emotional stress and pain. She paid respect to herself, him and the relationship, and didn’t jump onto the next best man to ease her pain. She stayed alone and dealt with the breakup!

Tony on the other hand, did the complete opposite. He couldn’t deal with the pain and being alone, so he jumped onto the “third best” thing. We were all shocked to see whom he chose after his beautiful ex! The new older lady presents him with financial stability, and he is simply “comfortable” using the situation and “parking” with her. There is no deep passion running through his veins, and no blood pumping in his heart, which drives Tony crazy with love – and the sex is not that special either. His pain was masked over at first, but after some months, he found himself thinking more and more about his ex, and missing her a lot! The new lady feels that he still loves his ex, and this drives her crazy! Tony misses his true love, her touch, her smile and scent. He misses her caresses, the passionate kisses, the fun quirky character, the long talks about life and everything else on the planet. She is unlike any other women he ever knew! True love cannot just “disappear” or be substituted by some third-best option. They have been through a lot together, and such a strong bond cannot be easily replaced. I told him, had he dealt with his shit the right way, none of this would be happening. I have pity for her because it hurts very much to know that he will never love her even close to as much as he loves his ex. The new older lady tries to hang onto him with her claws and teeth… but he is slipping away.

“Working out our shit” is not only connected to love problems, but also with everyday life occurrences. For example, if you have a debt to pay out, bills, something hurts you and you haven’t checked it out at the doctor yet, you had a fight with your best friend, get a new job, lose weight, your car sounds strange, or that thing you’ve been meaning to do for years now, finish your taxes, get rid of a phobia, stop smoking or drinking, or whatever it is you need to do and have been pushing away to the side! If you don’t deal with your problems the right way, they will only cause you extreme stress and anxiety. They will sit and eat away at your brain, creating one stressful worry after another! The only way to stop this madness is to get up, take action, and solve your issues! “Action” is the only way to attack and solve problems. The most amazing thing is that once you find your power and courage to simply start, the solution will slowly come to you in the process as well. However, this will only happen if you are willing to take the first step, and take action.

Ladies and gentlemen the best advice I can give you, after falling down myself a few times is: No matter how tough things seem to be, take the first step of action. It’s ok to take baby steps at first, but it’s important to start and not drag things out! Do not burry the pain or hide the problems for a later time, find your courage and deal with your shit ASAP, or else your shit will deal with you! If it deals with you, it may bring with it health issues, stress, illness, anxiety or even paranoia. Life is a bitch, and we must all deal with our own given dosage of shit. So unless we find the courage to take action, we will be left swept aside as “victims” of our problems. And trust me, you don’t want to be a poor victim in life. Pity is handed out for free, and jealousy must be earned!

Give each other space
Give each other space 1354 437 Galia Brener

You know that feeling when you’ve been single for a long while and finally meet a really wonderful person? You start seeing each other once a week, and then spending more and more time together. You go out and have fun, watch shows, movies, dancing, theater, restaurants, galleries, events, sports, meet up with friends, sleep over at each other’s place, and and and. You fall in love, and want to spend every waking moment together. But before you start dominating each other’s time, think again! Love can be quickly suffocated if no space is given.

My friend Gloria met a man whom she assumed was her soulmate and the love of her life. The attraction and connection was instantaneous. This was what most people would call “love at first sight.” They met and were already holding hands and caressing each other after the first hour! It felt just perfect. Gloria and Tony started spending a lot of time together. Actually, they did everything together. They understood each other so well, and sometimes even had moments when one knew what the other was thinking about. Indeed it was magic. They never got tired of each other, and could talk about different things for hours and hours each day without getting bored. When they were not home together, they chatted on the phone or wrote each other. They quickly became best friends as well and lovers.

After a few months Tony moved in with Gloria, and they had their little paradise in the city. But the flat was rather small for two people, and slowly the problems started to appear. I didn’t see Gloria for months at a time. She disappeared into the “Lover’s Black Hole” where she stayed in her pink cocoon with Tony. Those two were attached at the hip, and didn’t spend much time with any of their friends, only relying on each other for company. At the beginning it was ok, but after a while it became a real strain on their relationship. Tony wanted to stay at home a lot and didn’t like to go out. Gloria used to go out with us for dinner, movies, events, etc. but ever since meeting him, she didn’t spend much time with her friends. This went on for one and a half years. Eventually they were fighting more, and had no place to escape to, in order to get a bit of calmness and space, because their flat was small. So they would flee to their parent’s house in order to avoid the other. This was a big mistake, because it drove them even further apart. The fights increased, and the atmosphere at home was sharp like a knife. Eventually one day the relationship snapped and broke down. There was too much tension and pressure. Had they given each other more space in the first place, none of this would have happened. They took each other very much for granted due to their ego and false pride. This shows that even the most precious love can wither and die if not given any room to breathe and flourish.

This is not only the case with fresh new love, but also long relationships. In order for the bond to stay strong, each partner needs time and space for themselves. To meet friends, work on their hobbies and get a chance to have a life outside of the home and relationship. Ladies it’s a big mistake to forget your friends as soon as you have a new boyfriend. They were there for you during good and bad times, and they will always be there for you. So please don’t exclude them out of your life as soon as you have a new man! I would also suggest for you to have a regular girl’s night out evenings to stay in touch and close to your friends. You had a life before the man, so make sure to keep it while he’s in your life. Your partner will also find you more appealing knowing that you have your own things to do, and not just simply hang onto him all the time. No man likes that. The more you show him your independence, the more drawn he will be to you! I don’t know why, but the busier I am, and the more I have going for me, the more I feel the man is drawn to me. Strange but it always happens that way. I also had to learn this the hard way in a similar situation to Gloria.

It’s also important that the man has regular nights with his guys. Never ever try to separate a man from his guys. He will grow to resent you for this. Always give him space to do his things and see his friends and family. You can meet family and friends together as well, but please give each other the option and space to do this on your own too. My friend’s boyfriend once said, “It’s ok not to see each other for a few days. It gives you both a chance to miss each other.” Back then I thought that was a stupid thing say, but now I think it’s brilliant! The more space you give each other, the more you miss your partner, and can’t wait to be in each other’s arms again. It’s also nice to gather experiences and nice things that happened to you while apart, and share them with your partner. Like coming back from a mission while collecting secret data to share with your loved one! After all, you want a man, and not a pet, right? The strange and funny thing is that it’s a reversed psychology trick really – give them space, and they will come running to you!

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