Monthly Archives :

January 2014

Avoid falling in love with a donkey
Avoid falling in love with a donkey 1354 437 Galia Brener

We live in a world where things move quickly, and people do not really take the time to get to know each other well. A couple meets, dates, falls in “love” – or most likely in “lust”, gets into some fights, and then “Next!” They split up because “It didn’t work out” – and around the corner are ten new boys and girls waiting. I ask myself, what ever happened to taking the time and dating, romancing and getting to know each other properly? How well do we actually know the person we suddenly fall so madly in love with? Can we avoid falling for the wrong person and save ourselves the torturous pain?

My friend Ambrosia met a man who she was absolutely sure was the love of her life. On their first date, he took her out a romantic dinner in a hidden away restaurant, on a warm summer evening, and they talked about life under the night sky. It was like a scene out of a movie. Right there and then she fell hopelessly und utterly in love with him. They started dating, and spent every day together. He was charming, romantic, and appeared to be kind and caring. Some time passed, and the first fights started. She closed her eyes on what she thought were the “small things”. Ambrosia convinced herself that these were simply short bad phases that will pass.

Unfortunately month after month, he kept changing towards her. She was beginning to see his true dark nature, but she didn’t want her pink bubble to burst and see the truth. His disrespect towards her grew. He took her for granted, didn’t treat her well, and also began to be verbally abusive. He put her down, and was everything but compassionate and empathetic towards her. What the hell was happening? How could the love of her life, and supposed soulmate turn into such a monster right in front of her eyes? She made him out to be a prince charming in her heart and mind, which was actually a completely different person than he really was! It all ended horribly with a broken heart that was difficult for her to heal. She felt so devastated and betrayed by him. His true nature finally came out, and it was very ugly. She asked me, how could she have been so blind?

The problem was that he didn’t just “become” a mean guy. He was this same guy all along, but managed to somehow blind her with his artificial sparkling personality and charm. There is a Russian saying, “Love is a bitch, and can even make you fall in love with a donkey!” – in other words, love can blind you enough to fall for an asshole. Do you want to spare yourself a broken heart in the future? Here’s what you can do to minimize your chances of meeting a donkey disguised as a prince:

Observe: Listen, and let him speak more at the beginning, especially the first few dates. We women love to talk, and sometimes do not shut up enough, but this is very necessary at the beginning, so you can actually hear what’s going on in his brain. Pay close attention to what and how he says it. Does he talk bad about people, criticize and complain a lot? (Speaking badly about the ex is not a good sign – a gentleman never bad-mouths any women). Does he make nasty jokes at the expense of others? How does he respond to various situations? Does he keep calm, or is he short-tempered, and freaks out quickly? Observe his relationship with his family. Is he kind and caring towards his grandmother, mother, or sister? What are this thoughts and action patterns – is he bossy, judgmental or mean?

Actions speak louder than words: Do his actions match the things he says? Is he trustworthy and reliable when promising something? How does he act around elderly people or animals – is he kind to them? Does he do good deeds? It’s one thing to write sweet things to you, but does he also do these sweet things? Does he call you mostly in the later hours (make sure it’s not a booty call thing for him).
Ask questions: Play Sherlock Holmes (no, not the sex game – that comes later), and dig a bit deeper. Ask him about his childhood, life plans and dreams. Ask some strange and surprising questions simply to see how he reacts. What also helps is no sex right away. I know this sounds super old-fashioned, but the longer you wait to sleep with him, the more you find out about him. Let him romance you first, and make an effort to get you. Things that are acquired “too easily” are never cherished as much as those that one must work and make an effort for.

There are many “small things” that can give you a glimpse into the heart, soul and mind of a man. You must turn your antennae on, and recognize all of his signals, because men give out a lot of information in the first few months. I have been there myself before, and know how important it is to look deeper within someone. Once upon a time I’ve fallen so hard on my ass due to love, and it took a while to join the living again, so please try not to repeat my mistake. Most important, do not lie to yourself. You know those situations when he says or does something strange and your stomach jumps up and tries to escape through your mouth, but you let it go because you want this to work out. Well, if your gut is telling you that something is wrong, then it most likely is. Women are born with a built-in sensor, better known as the “Intuition”. Learn to use this strange Intuition-thing more often to avoid falling in love with the next donkey, no matter how handsome and charming he is. Keep your eyes, ears and heart open. My Mama always says to wear the “Truth Goggles” to clearly see who is standing in front of you.

Can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater?
Can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater? 1354 437 Galia Brener

2014 will be a wonderful year. It feels like it’s a new beginning for many wonderful things. I see that people are becoming aware of their health, relationships, ideologies and even values are changing positively. This is the beginning of a new era where humans are not just taking, but also finally giving back to each other and the world. Lately what has been catching my eye is the fact that many of my friends have been adopting the vegetarian and vegan lifestyle. So what does this mean for relationships? Since this is quite an important change for people, can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater?

A few weeks ago, my friend Heather met a great guy. She was so happy that after years of dating players, freaks and jerks, this might finally be “The One”! They met for drinks the following weeks and had a wonderful time talking about life, adventures, goals and dreams. Heather was incredibly happy and felt the butterflies flinging themselves wildly in her stomach. On Saturday evening, Mr. Perfect invited her over to his house for dinner. She put her prettiest dress on and floated over to his place, her heart racing and a smile permanently attached to her face.

When Heather arrived, she noticed the effort that he put into this date. The lights were dimmed, the candles flickering, the sensual music vibrating throughout the house, and the table was set to perfection – with delicious salads, dips, breads, and a bottle of wine for the perfect mood. They ate and drank, and Heather felt herself floating away to paradise. Mr. Perfect stood up, and announced, “Now comes the best part of the dinner!” and went into the kitchen. After some minutes she smelled a horrible stench. It was the unmistakable odor of grilled flesh. She walked into the kitchen and saw her strong, handsome man frying two huge pieces of meat. He turned around and flashed her the warmest, heart-melting smile she has ever seen. “Hey baby, look what I made for you. The nicest piece of Wagyu beef I could find in the market!” He put the meat on a plate and cut it in half. The blood oozed grotesquely from of the steak, and the meat was floating amidst the fat and blood on the plate. Heather’s stomach turned and she almost threw up all over him. It was not his fault, and he was just trying to please her in his way. He was so charming, and it felt like his bright blue eyes were burning into her heart. Damn. She was in love with him already. Heather smiled uncomfortably and said, “I forgot to tell you. I’m vegan.”

What the hell should Heather do now, should she stop dating him because he eats meat? Could she ever be together with a person that doesn’t understand her need to protect animals and her own body? How will they cook together? How will she stand those bloody steaks in front of her face again? Stop. Let me introduce you to someone. She’s a mysterious lady that knows no limits. She does what she wants, and when she wants it. She knows no religion, race, size or shape, and she definitely doesn’t care about meat, grains or vegetables! Her name is Love, and she is a tricky bitch.

However mad she is, Love is the most beautiful thing in the world. Thankfully there are ways to deal with her and your food preferences: 1. Communication. 2. Compromise. 3. Tolerance. Talk to your partner about how you feel, what you prefer, what your views are about health, animal rights, cruelty and so on. Be patient while explaining your point of view. Never express yourself with anger or force, otherwise you overstep the boundaries of becoming a fanatic, and may even push your other vegan friends away. It’s about respect and harmony, and not force and anger. After you communicate how you feel, and also hear out their opinion, you can make a compromising step together. How about cooking vegan at home, and eating meat outside? She can go out with the girls and eat all of the meat her heart desires. You can show her your world and cook a delicious vegan meal for her at home, or take her to your favorite vegan restaurant. Gently introduce your partner into your meat-free world, but never ever force them to change their habits and opinions. It will only push them further away from you! Don’t ask your vegan partner to prepare meat for you, because that could make them feel very uncomfortable. Last but not least is tolerance. Discuss this issue, accept each other’s choices, and do not try to change your partner! We live in 2014, and not in the middle ages where they burned witches for eating herbs – pun intended. You want to be accepted for your choices, so do that same with others. Let him eat his sashimi in peace, and get over it. I think that we should not make a big deal about what our partners eat. After all, isn’t it about freedom of choice and respecting that?

True love is not that easy to come by these days, therefore one must be downright insane to let a good person go because of what they eat. We have enough love crap to deal with as it is, so why not relax and just enjoy life and love as it is? We humans are really good at making our own life unnecessarily complicated. Instead of having meat-fights, spend more time kissing, cuddling, making love, enjoying mind-blowing orgasms, holding your lover close to your heart, and building a future together, rather than creating moronic boundaries. The progress is enormous, but there is still enough cruelty to battle within the world right now, so are we really going to allow meat or vegetables to divide us even further?

Sex out of the bed for 1 month!
Sex out of the bed for 1 month! 1354 437 Galia Brener

You come home from work, probably tired as hell, eat something in front of the TV and have a nice glass of red to ease the stress of the day. You try to seduce your man, but he just smiles back and puts on a game. Knowing better than to ever bother a man while watching his “Holy ESPN” channel, you get up and change for bed. If you’re lucky, he comes into bed before you fall asleep. If you’re double lucky, he rips off your nightie and plays with your clit, instead of the remote control. But back to reality, it usually ends up being a 5-minute session in the same position, on the same bed, with the same rhythm and snoring sounds after. So what can you do to make sure that Mr. Sex doesn’t die? Try the “Bed-Ban” rule (Yes I made it up, but it works). Sex out of the bed for one month! It will bring back the “juiciness” into your love life.

The human brain is an asshole. Everything sexual that become a routine = boring. It’s time to shake that bastard up a bit. Give him – the brain of course – something to think about for weeks to come! And don’t be afraid to show your man that he doesn’t know “everything” about you, and that you have many more exciting tricks up your sleeve. Mystery in a relationship is worth gold! I came up with a list of 8 kinky places that made me hot just by thinking about it.

1. Haunted House: These places are great because they are extremely dark inside, and no one would ever know. If your lady moans, the others walking around will think that those are zombie sounds which are part of the attraction. Be careful because there are usually vampires and monsters running around there, so if you feel a third hand around your penis, it might not be your woman.

2. Bank vault: Take your sweetheart and go store some cash in your safety-deposit-box. The inside area does not have cameras, so you are safe to spread your bills on the table, or rather spread your woman’s legs and take her right there and then! What happens in the vault stays a locked secret in the vault.

3. Motorcycle: What’s sexier than a loud Harley with a Jekill & Hyde exhaust system, your man looking incredibly hot, and you sitting on top of him with your naked bum touching the cold metal of the bike?! Give him an exciting ride that he will never forget, and engrave yourself into his memory every time he sees his beloved motorcycle.

4. Elevator & Stairwell: These two are risky, yet very exciting locations to have sex with your love. Your heart will race a mile and hour because you will not know when the door will open. The rules are that you have to be fast! Wear a skirt with nothing underneath for that extra rush.

5. Airport parking garage: The airport has a certain excitement about it. There is no better way to say, “Have a good business trip darling” than with the hottest sex he has ever had at 7am in the morning! Drive your handsome man to the airport, and as he’s about to get out, lock the car doors and climb on top of him. The steamier the windows become, the better! Bon voyage baby – and believe me, he will think a lot about you during his trip, and will count the minutes to come back home to his seductive vamp!

6. Roof of a building: If you have access to your roof, go up there with a bottle of Champagne, a blanket, and a trench coat with nothing underneath. If you don’t have a roof, sneak onto someone else’s! Or even better, go to a roof part with your man, and disappear around the corner while people are drinking and dancing.

7. On a piano: You can’t play the piano? Well you don’t have to. Sit on it with your legs spread apart, and let your guy play with you. I bet it will be the most beautiful sound that ever came out of that instrument. Turn around, and press your breasts against the lacquer finish, while your partner takes you deeply from behind. Make music your way!

8. On a swing outside in the rain: Feel like a kid again! Hopefully you didn’t have sex as a kid on a swing, but this time you are allowed to be bad and dirty. Best time is after midnight, when the city is asleep, and the only spies are the fresh drops on rain on your flushed faces. Wrap yourself around your man, and feel how good it is to have him inside of you. Breathe in deeply, and feel the intense connection magnified by the water running down your back.

You can also get wild inside of your home. Try the kitchen floor, while riding him beside the fridge with the door open for the nipple-hardening cooling effect. Do the laundry, while he’s taking you during the fastest spinning cycle – you will feel him deep inside, and the vibrations shiver through your entire body. You must get clean after being dirty, so take that hot man into the shower with you. You can either lean against the wall with him taking you from behind, or get him to sit on the shower floor and slide yourself down onto him, with the water drizzling over your bodies. Don’t forget to get that “thing you need” out of the basement and have your man take you hard against the carton boxes. With creativity and the desire to spice up your relationship, you can sex your way to bliss and bring back the naughty butterfly feeling again! Just remember the rules of the experiment: sex outside of the bed for 1 month!

Keep your woman happy!
Keep your woman happy! 1354 437 Galia Brener

Dear gentlemen, this article is for you. All women want a man that will make an effort to romance them – long after the butterfly phase is over. Getting the women might seem to you like the biggest task in the dating game, however that is only a tiny part of the battle won. The real challenge is not getting the woman, but actually keeping her! I’m sure you are sitting with your eyebrow raised and a smirk on your face now, but don’t worry, it’s not as hard as you think – you don’t need to be Hercules or a millionaire to succeed at this. Yes I know that women also have to do nice stuff for you, but this article is just about us, and what you can do to keep us happy and satisfied by your side.

Let’s compare this to your car that you love so damn much. Imagine you get your dream car – it’s so fast, shiny and new! Every time you see it, a wave of happiness rushes through your body, and you can’t get your eyes off your new baby! Driving your new car is one of the best feelings in world, and flying in it on the highway gives you such an incredible high. A year goes by, and you notice a few dents here and there. The new car smell has long evaporated, the leather interior is not so pristine anymore, and the rims have scratches on them. Your car is slowly getting older, but it’s still your baby, and you will take care of it, right? With every 10,000 km you lovingly pat her on the steering wheel, and thank her for being so good to you. Even if she gets very old, and is now considered an old-timer, you wont just leave her to rust. Much like beautiful cars, women need care and attention as well. If you don’t invest time and effort into taking care of the things you love, you will lose them. When they’re gone you will realize what you had, unfortunately a little too late, and end up with: a lost love and a broken car.

1. Respect and appreciation: Tell her that you’re proud that she is your girl! When she tells you something that’s important to her, be a good listener, and make an effort to understand her. In return, share things about yourself, like your hopes and dreams. Ask for her advice in various situations, so she sees that you respect her and her opinion. Take responsibility for the words that come out of your mouth, and be more tolerant and calm. Once in a while, it’s ok to back down in arguments. Praise her for the good things she does, her talents and skills. Allow her to be herself, and appreciate her uniqueness and special qualities. Never forget to be a gentleman and open the door for her, walk on the outside of the sidewalk, help her with her coat and seat. Be the strong man that is there to protect her no matter what happens, and the one she can rely and lean on. Assure her that you have plans for your future together, and that you are not simply having your fun and using her. Show that you are not afraid of commitment and responsibility, and are financially secure to take care of your future family.

2. Attention: Enjoy spending time with her, and make her a priority. Let her feel that she is important for you, and that she comes first, and not last on your list. It’s ok to make her feel like a princess with your love and attention. Say that you love her more often, and don’t forget the compliments! Just a simple, “You are so beautiful” works very well. Give her emotional security, and be her best friend. Show her attention by writing a text message during the day that you’re thinking of her. Try to sometimes include her with your guy friends when going out, and say something nice about her in front of your friends. This shows that you are proud to have her by your side.

3. Make love, not war: Take the time out of your busy schedule to make love, and also have wild passionate sex. Women need physical reassurance as well, which shows that you are still attracted to her! Don’t forget that foreplay is very important for women to make them hot and ready. Always have time for cuddling and kissing. In general, try to kiss her more often! Come up and slowly kiss the back of her neck while hugging her from behind. It’s always good to plant some unexpected kisses when walking by her. Be romantic, and give her a nice full body massage. Sex is very important to keep the fire going in your relationship, so get creative!

4. Empathy and compassion: Be there for her when she needs it the most, especially during the difficult times. Show that you care about her sorrows, and help her in hard and stressful situations. It’s also important to be helpful and sympathetic if she’s sick – even if you think her illness is not severe, be there for her anyways. Make (or buy) her chicken soup and serve it to her in bed with a funny smile. In general, try to be as patient as you can with her, and don’t hesitate to apologize if you do something wrong. Show your sincerity, kindness, and make her laugh.

5. Gifts and surprises: Get into the habit of bringing her flowers for no special reason. Put her favorite chocolate bar in her bag, and hide a cute teddy bear under her blanket. Invite her on spontaneous unplanned romantic weekend trips. Even if you don’t like a movie, or foreign city/vacation place that she does, take her there because she’s your woman, and you want to please her. Invite her somewhere new for a romantic dinner, and be creative with your choices. Gifts are not only for birthdays and Christmas, so listen when she tells you about things she wants, and surprise her from time to time by getting her something special. It must not be expensive, but it has to come from the heart!

I know I have listed a lot of things to do, but take your time and do it because you want to, and not because you have to. Actions and deeds speak louder than words. Always remember to never take your woman for granted. If you are not good to her, she will eventually leave, and another man will be very willing to make her happy! Relationships are not always easy, and love can be a real bitch, but if you figure out the formula to make her happy, believe me, she will give you even more in return. Making your woman feel special is not so difficult, and a bit more effort on your part will get you ahead (and even head ;-) and keep your woman feeling very happy!

Get him with a smile!
Get him with a smile! 1354 437 Galia Brener

It’s a proven fact that people want to be happy, and therefore they gravitate towards other happy people. I hear many women complaining that when they go out, they hardly ever meet anyone – and this coming from attractive and successful women! Why is that? What are they doing wrong? Well ladies, it’s not just about looking fabulous and wearing your best dress and shoes when going out. The best accessory you must always wear – is actually the one you were born with, and is part of your natural beauty – your smile! Body language is more important than you may think it is. You can have the most luxurious outfit on, long beautiful flowing hair and the nicest make – but without a genuine smile and happiness in your eyes, forget about meeting potential partners. Sour and bitter are the flavors of the past. Welcome 2014, the sweet year of happiness, love and beautiful smiles!

During the holidays, my friend Jilli went out with the girls and they decided to make an experiment. They started the evening off at their favorite bar in Frankfurt, The Parlour. Jilli was chosen as the “Smiling-Happy-Goddess”, Gloria as the “Too-Cool-For-You-Bitch” and Claudia as the “Sad-Little-Cookie-Help-Me-Girl”. The experiment was to see which attitude-style would have a better chance to meet someone. All three of them looked drop-dead gorgeous this evening. They sat at the bar exactly in the middle of the room, to see and be seen. The bartender made them delicious signature Parlour drinks, and so the experiment began! Shortly later, two tall handsome men arrived and sat beside them. The dark-haired one looked at Jilli a few times, and she returned his glance with a smile. She kept talking to the girls, telling them a story with a lot of action, laughing out loud, with her hands swinging everywhere. She glanced back at the guy and flashed him another warm smile, and his attention was immediately on her. The man introduced himself to Jilli, and they had a very nice conversation. He also gave her a compliment on her beautiful bright smile. It worked! Since this was a serious experiment for the sake of dating research, the girls stayed strictly in their roles. The second guy attempted to talk to Gloria, but after a few minutes, the conversation went nowhere. She did not smile at all, and had to stay cold and expressionless in her role. Meanwhile, Claudia continued looking sad and distant, and no man approached her.

The ladies were having a really fun evening, and decided to take their experiment to a party. Jilli dragged the ladies onto the dance floor, and the test continued. Claudia spotted a group of guys and made eye contact. However it was not kindly returned, because her sad eyes did the opposite and repelled the men away. Next came Gloria with her killer-cool-bored-look, but also with nothing in return. Then Jilli beamed her gorgeous open smile, and within minutes the gentlemen were dancing closer to them. After a few more songs, more eye-catching looks and warm smiles, the birthday boy came over, and offered Jilli a drink. Obviously the experiment worked, so the girls gave up their rolls and decided to join in on the fun. Almost immediately one of the guys in the group told Claudia that she looks much better with a smile upon her face! Again a proven fact – happiness attracts people. All three girls had a really wonderful evening and came home wearing three very beautiful, and happy smiles. One of them really likes the guy she met that night, and has been in touch with him ever since!

Many women are negatively influenced by the media, fashion and beauty industry. However, the facial expressions they see and unconsciously copy from the magazines and TV are definitely not open, warm or sincere. They copy the mimic of runway models or action hero actresses, and they end up looking cold, expressionless, bored and simply “Too cool for you”. Many glossy magazines advise women to walk around with a cool aloof facial expression, and not appear to care too much. They call this the “hard to get” appearance, which should attract men. Unfortunately exactly the opposite happens, and this does not attract men at all. As a matter of fact, it scares most men off! I asked a few of my male friends, and they all said they would never approach a woman that looks arrogant, bored, cold or distant.

Another important fact is what seems like “obvious” flirting for us women, is really not enough for men to get the point that we are interested. If you go up to a man and ask for the time, or a lighter and quickly walk away after, he will not get it. Men do not understand those subtle signs of attention. You need to be a bit more direct by making obvious eye contact, and flash him that seductive irresistible smile of yours. If you do that a few times, while keeping your eyes locked with his longer and longer each time, then he will get the point. I know it’s 2014, but I am still old-fashioned, and believe in men approaching the women. You are a Lady, so let him come to you first. In order for him to feel confident in doing this, give him the direct signs that you are interested in him. Please do not overdo it with the smiling, so he doesn’t think that you have a nervous tic. Avoid looking bitchy, mean, aggravated, cold, arrogant and bored. Please no runway-killer-too-cool-for-you look either. Be open and approachable, calm and happy, but definitely not too easy or desperate looking. Try to find the successful balance of easy-going and being open for new contacts. After all, men are hunters, so let them do the hunting and feel proud for finding such a wonderful catch, such a fabulous, amazing woman – you! Good luck, have fun, and don’t forget to smile!

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