Yearly Archives :

2014

Destroy the shit before 2015 – Part 1
Destroy the shit before 2015 – Part 1 1354 437 Galia Brener

 

It’s that time again when the year is winding down and we are confronted with our demons. Some call this the “Holiday Blues”, thinking they might be depressed, sad or lonely, but it’s much deeper and more important than just that. It’s a crucial time that will determine how you step into the next year and which direction your life will go. This is a tough love article, so I might seem somewhat harsh, but it’s for our own good.

Like it or not, a new year is a “reset”. Even if you don’t believe in this, your brain is subconsciously influenced by the thought of a “new start”. If you are honest with yourself, there are some things that you can change and improve about your life. In order to do so, you must first destroy the existing defective base before you build a new structure. No one builds a new luxury building on a rotten old foundation. Never! First everything is destroyed, cleaned out, and then rebuilt.

This week I deal with the points of elimination and destruction of the bad things in your life that drain your happiness. (Next week I will address how to rebuilt a new foundation).

1. Get rid of the toxic people in your life. Cut off anyone that hurts and drains you. They won’t help you grow and will only deplete your goodness with their needy problems and dramas. Be tough even if it seems merciless. You are not their emotional garbage bin so don’t let them dump their shit in your life. Enough!

2. Forgive. This is a tough point, especially if someone has hurt you badly. Regardless if the were friends, exes or colleagues, forgive all these idiots that hurt you. You are doing this for yourself and not for them! You don’t have to speak to them or see them again – but forgiveness allows you to burn away “your” pain and anger, which is blocking you from the good new things.

3. Say NO. We do too many things to be “good” for others, and sometimes even do what we don’t want to. Stop it immediately and don’t hesitate to say NO! Stop going against yourself. By the way, the others will respect you actually more for standing your ground.

4. Nothing is personal. Remember; when people do or say something mean to you, it’s their issue and not yours! Destroy the ability to let others make you feel bad and guilty for no justifiable reason. Don’t take shit from no one, especially when they are trying to deliberately offend or hurt you.

5. Learn to be selfish. We give and give and give so much, but forget ourselves in the process. The love you gave your ex or so-called friend, give that to yourself now. Love yourself truly, because you deserve it. It’s your life so do what’s good for you.

6. Let go. How willing you are to let go of stinky old garbage depends on how much you truly love yourself. Not letting go brings emotional, physical and mental pain and illness. If you really want to be happy and healthy, then you have no choice but to let go of the past and make place for the good things and people in your life.

7. Destroy all bad habits. Easier said than done? No. If you truly want to be healthy and not die, then you can do it. It’s all about willpower, making that “1 decision” and sticking to it! Stop smoking. Stop taking drugs. Stop drinking alcohol excessively (only in moderation). Stop eating damaging food. If you can’t do it alone, then get external help and stop hurting yourself.

8. Throw away all the junk you don’t need. Like the bad people that collect dust in your life, so do the things that you don’t need. I hate going into homes that are cluttered with “stuff” because I can’t breathe there. Your home reflects your inner self, so why block yourself with useless things? Take a big garbage bag on the weekend, go from room to room, throw away the small crap and destroy the clutter. Keep it simple. Give the clothing and things you don’t need to charity.

Like my Papa always tells me, “Make a solid firm decision and stick to it. Going back and forth will only bring more pain and insecurity.” Some of these 8 points may sound tough, but are necessary in order to move into a better life and a happier new year. We must never stop to work on ourselves and develop for the better. We have this one life, so why deprive ourselves of complete happiness?

Next week comes part 2 about rebuilding the good after the destruction of the bad.

To be continued …

Is this a date or not?
Is this a date or not? 1354 437 Galia Brener

Have you ever met with someone that you liked, went for dinner, maybe drinks after or even dancing, and at the end of the evening you get a hug and a friendly smile with a quick “thanks” and “bye”. You are left standing there wondering, “What the hell just happened? Was that even a date? Or does s/he only like me as a friend?” Rest assured that you are not alone and this strange confusion happens quite often.

My friend Bill met a girl that he really liked. They “hung out” and always had fun. They did many things together like go to shows, dinners and parties. However, Jessica never kissed him or showed any physical interest in him. They never spoke about romance or sexual things. Bill thought that she simply needs her time. He was falling for her, and was in denial without wanting to face the truth. This kept on going for a few months, and still nothing happened. I told Bill that even an extremely shy girl would have wanted to kiss him after a few months, given that she was interested in him as more than just friends. Slowly he was starting to realize that these were not “romantic” dates! I told him to ask her straightforward, but he didn’t have the courage and didn’t want to risk pushing her out of his life. He did fall in love with her in the process, and unfortunately got hurt after realizing that she only thought of him as a “friend”. This can be avoided if you pay attention to the following signs:

It’s a date:

1. He reserves a table at a restaurant and pays the bill.

2. S/he acts nervous around you on the first few dates.

3. There is some physical contact during the date – slight touching of forearm, elbow, etc. while talking.

4. You feel the chemistry and tension between you, and he wants / tries to kiss you.

5. S/he asks you a lot of questions, and seems genuinely interested in you, and wants to get to know you better. They show interest!

6. They compliment you in a flirty way.

7. S/he sends you a “Thank you and good night” text after the date.

8. He acts very chivalrous and is a gentleman, and tries to positively impress you.

It’s not a date:

1. S/he asks you to go to a group event, and doesn’t pay much attention exclusively to you.

2. If s/he asks you to “hang out”, and you end up doing something non-romantic at all.

3. Spending time with a colleague and talking mostly about work, without personal questions.

4. If s/he talks a lot about a love interest or a person they like.

5. Talks about their friends, and who would be a good match for you. Or gives you tips about dating, the opposite sex, flirting etc.

6. No effort with their physical appearance. No one wears sweat pants on dates.

7. S/he is not flirting or playful with you, and no kiss or physical intimacy.

8. They bring a friend with them.

We live in an era full of confusions, where a date can actually be a non-date, or the person you fell in love with actually thinks you are their best friend, and nowhere near a romantic interest at all. Listen to your gut feeling and pay attention to the other’s body language. You should “feel” if there is romantic tension or not, and never lie to yourself. Never run after someone that doesn’t want you, because that will damage your confidence and self-respect. Make yourself available for someone that sees how wonderful you are, and actually wants to have romantic dates with you!

The best advice I can give you is to be straightforward. Communicate and simply ask them in a cute way, “Are we going on a date?” with a smile while asking. This should never be an embarrassing thing to do! Better to say it straight up and know where you stand, rather than get hurt after, like my friend Bill did. We were born with mouths to speak and ask what we don’t understand. It’s so easy, but unfortunately we make it complicated for ourselves. Guessing games suck too much happiness away from you. Don’t guess, just ask.

You want revenge?
You want revenge? 1354 437 Galia Brener

 

Do you find yourself fantasizing about revenge that you can get on someone that did something bad to you? Perhaps someone took something from you that you really loved, or simply came, used and left? Maybe they cheated and broke your heart? Theft or friend betrayal? Or spread gossip about you? Whatever it was that happened, I am sure that it was painful. Like you, I have also experienced this unjust pain. Many of us did. The second emotion after the pain subsides is anger. With anger comes the fierce need for revenge! You think to yourself, “If only, this person can suffer like I did…” STOP. Don’t do anything. Revenge is an automatic reaction to all evil actions in this world. You don’t even have to move your finger for it to happen.

You have all heard of her. She hides in the shadows and waits for “those people” to pass by. Then suddenly she leaps out and bites them in the ass, with her sharp metal teeth, ripping through their flesh and bones. She has no mercy, and she always locates her “targets”. Her name is Karma, and she never attacks innocent victims. She only hunts for those who deserve it, and she has a bloody long list with names on it.

My friend Heather was dating a man for a few years. She loved him more than any other person on Earth, and she thought he did as well. Everything was going well until someone told her that they saw him at a bar, kissing another woman. Apparently he had been cheating on her for months now. They broke up and she was devastated. After a year of tears and pain Heather met a wonderful man and the got married. Her ex however was living a horrible nightmare. The woman he cheated with, ended up cheating on him, and got pregnant from another man! She didn’t tell him about it until the child was born with red hair. Both had dark hair. The DNA test proved that it wasn’t his child. The ex came crying to Heather, saying that he wanted her back. Heather was smart and told him to go back to his demon from hell, where he belongs.

Another story is of Michael who had a business partner Dan. Everything was going well, until Dan stole all the money from the business and ran away from the country. Michael was left with nothing, except for some debts to pay. He had to declare personal bankruptcy because he could not pay a penny back. Michael was lost because he didn’t know how to feed his family. Dan robed him of his entire existence, because he invested everything he had in this company. I will never forget seeing his empty eyes and pride drained from his body. A year later, news came that Dan was killed by the same people that he gave the stolen money to. Michael would have never wished death upon him, but it was not in his hands anymore. Karma decided what to do.

You have probably asked yourself, “Why is it that some people do really bad things, and don’t get punished for it?” So what really happens to these people? Do they simply continue to live their lives, enjoying their rotten behavior? Or does karma catch up with them, and make them wish they were never born? From all of the stories that I have heard so far, these monsters eventually get what they deserve. It might happen the next day, in a month, a year or even 10 years. I have seen it happen right before my eyes. It’s magic – somehow karma always knows who to get and when.

The most important piece of advice that I can give you is: DON’T DO ANYTHING! If you’ve been hurt by someone, do not plan a revenge. Sit comfortably back and let karma do her work. She gets paid quite well for it. You don’t want to get your hands dirty in the process. If you strike back, then you are doing something bad as well, and you might end up being her next victim! Don’t go down this evil path. The “Eye for an eye” theory is flawed because it will act like a boomerang, and bring the misery back to you again. It’s a damned circle, and you have to be the one who breaks it. Stay clean, and don’t go down to their level.

Karma is a very fair player. She never cheats. Good deeds will bring good rewards. Evil deeds will bring misery, pain and suffering. So I ask you again, do you want revenge? If yes, then do nothing and rest assured knowing that it will happen automatically. Justice will be done. To every action, there is a reaction. That’s the law of the universe.

Prada Men store opening in Frankfurt
Prada Men store opening in Frankfurt 1600 1600 Galia Brener
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Slowly but surely, our little Frankfurt is catching up with International glamour and flair. And guess what? We now have our very own Men’s Prada store, directly in the heart of the city at the Goetheplatz beside his stylish French brother, Louis Vuitton.

The opening event was incredible, an affair that I have never seen in Frankfurt before. Upon arrival, a beautiful model checked our name on the guest list, and waved us onto the red carpet. Photos were taken, and camera flashes illuminated the sky with bright stars. My best male friend Juan García was with me, and we were quite excited to go inside. Two champagne flutes were placed in our hands, and so the evening began.

We quickly realized how huge the store was. Over 1000 square meters spread out on two floors, filled with Prada clothing and accessories for men. Some of the women were jealous because the men have a bigger store and selection than the women do now. Juan of course thought that was fabulous! We were greeted by Daniel Tobias Etzel of the WAOH agency, who helped with the event and did a wonderful job! Celebrities were to be seen everywhere. Actors such as Benjamin Sadler, Florian Bartholomäi and Lavinia Wilson, film producer Oliver Berben and his lovely wife Katrin were also there, along with the handsome Kevin Trapp, the goalkeeper of the Eintracht Frankfurt soccer team.

The journey continued to the back of the store. We saw people gathered around a table, and of course us two curious cats could not resist. When we got there, we could not believe our eyes! A huge seafood buffet offering the tastiest delicacies that the ocean has to offer. Oysters bigger than my hand, lobster tails, giant crabs and shrimps. We filled up our plates, and proceeded upstairs to dance, eat and party at Prada!

The top floor was darker than downstairs and accentuated with red lights all around. It felt like being in a chic new club, with couture clothing everywhere – what a refreshing new concept! The hypnotizing beats came from the French DJ team The Penelopes, who did an excellent job of getting the people to dance and have fun. There were two additional bars upstairs, with service from my favorite Schumann’s bar in Munich. Juan and I danced non-stop for an hour. We saw people flirting all around us, and I am sure that a few new romances began that evening. Needless to say, not many people left the store before midnight.

Dearest Prada, you have really outdone yourself this time. Never have I been to such a fabulous store opening before! So much fun, glamour, excitement and couture packed into one event. Bravo!

The surprises didn’t stop at midnight. The following week, Mr. Etzel personally came to my home and brought me a beautiful gift. An elegant leather Prada wallet – a thank you for attending this unforgettable event. What can I say: Prada, you were and will always stay on top of my favorite fashion list!

 

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13 simple things to make your woman happy
13 simple things to make your woman happy 1354 437 Galia Brener

 

Last week I gave you the men’s 13-point list of happiness. This week I compiled our list, and I am pleased to say that there are many similarities! At the end of the day, we all want happiness and love. Getting the women might seem like the hardest part of the dating game, however that is only a small portion of the battle won. The real challenge is not getting the woman, but rather keeping her happy by your side! Dear men, I’m sure you are sitting with your eyebrows raised and a smirk on your face now, but don’t worry, it’s not as hard as you think – you don’t have to be Hercules or a millionaire to succeed at this.

Let’s make it easy for you to understand and compare this to your car that you love so damn much. Imagine you get your dream car – it’s fast, shiny and new! Every time you see it, a wave of happiness rushes through your body and you can’t get your eyes off your new baby! Driving it is one of the best feelings in world. A few years go by, and you notice dents here and there. The new car smell has long evaporated, the leather interior is not so pristine anymore, and the rims have scratches on them. Your car is getting older, but it’s still your baby and you will take care of it, right? With every 10,000 km you lovingly pat the steering wheel, and thank her for being so good to you. Even if she gets very old and is considered an old-timer, you wont just leave her to rust. Much like beautiful cars, women need proper care and attention as well. If you don’t invest time and effort into taking care of the things you love, then you will lose them.

Dear gentlemen, here is a list of 13 things that you can do to keep your woman very happy:

1. Foreplay – go down on her, make her hot and don’t forget to cuddle afterwards

2. Don’t tell her what to do

3. Accept her as she is

4. Be supportive, strong and courageous

5. Be a good listener – show her that you are loyal and caring

6. Be generous – financially and with your attention, compliments and love

7. Always be honest and faithful

8. Be a gentleman – show respect, good manners and take responsibility

9. Be funny and show your sense of humor

10. Surprises – sweet text messages, flowers, dinner and gifts

11. Stay sexy – don’t let yourself go

12. Show her appreciation, kindness and be forgiving

13. Make plans and commitment for your future together

This reminds me of Gloria’s unfortunate story. She was dating a guy who pretended to be her prince charming at the beginning, and did everything to sweep her off her feet. But as time passed by and the more effort she made, the less he gave back in return. He took her for granted, and this slowly killed the love she felt for him. Towards the end of the relationship, it seemed that he didn’t care much at all and showed his true narcissistic nature. Gloria eventually had enough of his selfish crap and left him. After she was gone, months later he finally realized how much he truly loved and missed her, but it was already too late. His flowers and love letters had no meaning for her anymore. She met a real man who was more than willing to make her very happy! Ladies before falling madly in love, keep your eyes open, and make sure that the man genuinely wants to make you happy because he truly loves you. I don’t want to see any more women suffer like Gloria did.

I know I have listed a lot of things to do, but take your time and do it because you want to and not because you have to. Actions and deeds speak louder than words. Always remember to never take your woman for granted. If you are not good to her, then she will eventually leave, and another man will be very willing to make her happy! Relationships are not always easy, and love can be a real bitch, but if you figure out the formula to make her happy, believe me, she will give you even more in return. Making your woman feel special is not so difficult, and a bit more effort on your part will get you ahead (and even head ;-) and keep your woman feeing very happy. After all, with all of the wonderful things we do for you, we deserve it!

13 simple things to make your man happy
13 simple things to make your man happy 1354 437 Galia Brener

 

I’m glad that I decided to write about this topic, because once again, I realized how easy it is to make men happy. Mon Dieu, they are so much less complicated than us women! It’s incredible how little they need to feel happy and loved. Give your man a blowjob, feed him and give him space to do his things, and he’ll be the happiest creature on Earth! Well, it’s not “quite” as easy as that ladies, but definitely not much more difficult either.

All the men that I have interviewed said more or less the same thing. The answers were very down to earth, and it didn’t seem like anyone needed something strange or appalling to make him happy. It makes me very glad to see that most men are happy with simple and doable actions that any woman can do to make her guy happy. Please note that none of them said they need a woman who works a lot, earns tons of money or buys him expensive gifts. No at all, they need a good woman to listen to them and show that she cares. Ladies if you follow these 13 simple things, you will have a very happy and grateful man by your side:

1. Blowjobs and sex. Don’t forget that men connect intimately and physically.
2. Be supportive.
3. Be a good listener, and show him that you are loyal and care.
4. Give him a massage when he’s tired.
5. Always be honest and truthful.
6. Be funny and show your sense of humor.
7. Give him space for his own things and friends.
8. Be happy and this will make him happy too! Ever hear of the saying “Happy wife, happy life?” It’s true, and your positivity will rub off on him too.
9. Surprises – like a cute note, small present, nice lingerie, and special dinner – cook something delicious for him.
10. Do sports together.
11. Stay sexy – don’t let yourself go.
12. Take interest in his hobby – and offer to do it together.
13. Emotional stability. Men don’t want, need or like drama.

This reminds me of Heather’s story. 5 years ago she met a guy and everything started off so well. The first few months were like living in a dream. They didn’t get out of bed for weeks, and she never had so many orgasms in her entire life before. They did lots of things together and really enjoyed each other’s company. But after the initial “Flowers, sex & chocolate” phase ended, reality set in, and Heather showed her egoistic side. Not only did she stop making herself look pretty when they met, but she stopped her effort all together. She told me that she hardly even had sex with him anymore, and didn’t bother doing small things to make him happy. After almost a year, he gave up as well, and the relationship became horrible. The fights began and the drama was out of control. The insane part was that she still loved him very much, but made no effort! I told her to start doing things to make him happy, but her answer was, “What has he done for me lately?!” It was a pure selfish power struggle between the two, and the end was very near. He was a good man, and Heather really regrets the breakup, crying that she could have done more to make him happy! He really didn’t ask for much, but Heather was unfortunately too selfish at the time to see that.

From my own experience, when a man is happy and gets what he needs from his woman, he is very open, pleased and even eager to give back. A good man will always show his appreciation. He sees, and more importantly feels when a woman really loves him and wants to make him happy. Besides, look at those easy 13 points, they are really not asking for too much. My dear ladies, it’s time for us to give back to our sweethearts and make an effort to keep them happy. The good ones definitely deserve it.

Sex on the first date?
Sex on the first date? 640 250 Galia Brener

We live in an age where traditions have become weaker, rules are not important and anything goes. Sleeping around is not so drastic anymore. Or is it? I have asked many of my male friends what their opinion was on this matter. I was very surprised that 75% of them said that they would rather wait with a girl that they really like, rather than jumping into bed right away with her. Most of them answered: No sex on the first date!

Here are the reasons why the men said “No”:

1. If she sleeps with me on the first date, she probable does that same with all the other men as well. I don’t want to have a girlfriend like that.

2. If you get sex right away, there is nothing left to top it off on the next dates.

3. We are hunters and need a challenge! We want to work for the cookie, and not get it easily right away. There’s no fun or excitement in that.

4. If I really like the girl, then I prefer to get to know her first. This builds up the passion and feelings.

5. This shows she respects herself, and I respect her even more for that.

Wow ladies, now that’s what I call some honest answers. Hope is not completely lost – there are still men out there with a gentleman-like outlook on life that are looking for true love and not just fast sex. This is very encouraging for us!

This brings me to Ambrosia’s story. She met a guy at the gym. He is average height, has dark thick hair and ice-colored blue eyes. He’s been flirting with her for a while now, and two weeks ago he finally made his move and asked her out. She agreed and was quite excited because she was very attracted to him. He took her out for a very nice dinner and show. After they went for drinks and had a perfect evening. She called me from the bathroom and asked if she should take him home with her. My gut feeling told me – No! I advised her to let him walk her to the door, thank him for a wonderful evening, allow him to kiss her, give him a tight hug, smile warmly and go upstairs – alone. She didn’t listen to me and took him home. They drank more upstairs, got drunk and had wild sex. Starting upstairs, the date lost its perfect magical feeling, and was more about the sex. They both enjoyed it very much, but surprise surprise; he didn’t call for days after. He sent her an sms 5 days later, saying he was busy. She summoned up the courage to ask why he was behaving so coldly all of a sudden. No joke, this is what he replied, “Ambrosia, you’re a fun girl, and we had a wild night. But I’m looking for something more serious.” She was shocked. She told him that she also wants something serious, and he said, “Do you do the same thing with every man you go out with on the first night – calling this your serious intention?” Ok I have to admit, the guy seems like a jerk, and used the situation, however it does show that she left a wrong impression on him.

Most men will jump at a chance to sleep with you on the first date, but are willing to wait if they really like you. Sure there are some couples that get together after sex on the first date, and even end up getting married – but the percent is much lower to those that actually take the time to get to know each other first.

Another thing the guys told me was that if he disappears after the first dates without sex and doesn’t stay around to get to know you better, than he was only after the sex. You don’t need such a man always. Ciao and next! Waiting to have sex is a wonderful and natural way of selection to see who is really into you, and who only wants your body for a few nights. Waiting with sex also allows you to build up feelings for the person, which will intensify the first sexual encounter and make it even more phenomenal. Sex with feeling is the best, even on the first time!

I agree with the guys that I interviewed, because in my opinion, I always like to get to know the man before. We live in a world where everything is rushed – and patience is almost nonexistent – so why not work against this system and take the time to get to know this new person in our life? What’s with this insane haste to have sex? Maybe this seems like old-fashioned to you, but why not go back to the courting era where dating actually meant something special, and not just getting into her panties? I see nothing wrong with letting the man romance us first. Going out for dinners and talking into the late night hours – learning to feel for this person, before jumping into bed – is such a nice luxury these days, so why not allow ourselves the time to enjoy this luxury? Most of the men told me that at the beginning, mental stimulation separates the woman who will simply become a sex affair or their next girlfriend. If you’re interested in the man for just a sex fling then go ahead, jump his bones. But for something serious, please take your time. It’s worth the wait and he will respect you even more for it.

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