date

Are you “dating” or just “hanging out”?

Are you “dating” or just “hanging out”? 1200 800 Galia Brener

Have you ever met with someone that you liked, went for dinner, maybe drinks after or even dancing, and at the end of the evening you get a hug and a friendly smile with a quick “thanks” and “bye”. You are left standing there wondering, “What the hell just happened? Was that even a date? Or does s/he only like me as a friend?” Rest assured that you are not alone and this strange confusion happens quite often. 

My friend Bill met a girl that he really liked. They “hung out” and always had fun. They did many things together like go to shows, dinners and parties. However, Jessica never kissed him or showed any physical interest in him. They never spoke about romance or sexual things. Bill thought that she simply needs her time. He was falling for her, and was in denial without wanting to face the truth. This kept on going for a few months, and still nothing happened. I told Bill that even an extremely shy girl would have wanted to kiss him after a few months, given that she was interested in him as more than just friends. Slowly he was starting to realize that these were not “romantic” dates! I told him to ask her straightforward, but he didn’t have the courage and didn’t want to risk pushing her out of his life. He did fall in love with her in the process, and unfortunately got hurt after realizing that she only thought of him as a “friend”. This can be avoided if you pay attention to the following signs:

It’s a date:

1. He reserves a table at a restaurant and pays the bill. 

2. S/he acts nervous around you on the first few dates.

3. There is some physical contact during the date – slight touching of forearm, elbow, etc. while talking. 

4. You feel the chemistry and tension between you, and he wants / tries to kiss you. 

5. S/he asks you a lot of questions, and seems genuinely interested in you, and wants to get to know you better. They show interest!

6. They compliment you in a flirty way.

7. S/he sends you a “Thank you and good night” text after the date. 

8. He acts very chivalrous and is a gentleman, and tries to positively impress you.

It’s not a date:

1. S/he asks you to go to a group event, and doesn’t pay much attention exclusively to you. 

2. If s/he asks you to “hang out”, and you end up doing something non-romantic at all. 

3. Spending time with a colleague and talking mostly about work, without personal questions.

4. If s/he talks a lot about a love interest or a person they like. 

5. Talks about their friends, and who would be a good match for you. Or gives you tips about dating, the opposite sex, flirting etc. 

6. No effort with their physical appearance. No one wears sweat pants on dates. 

7. S/he is not flirting or playful with you, and no kiss or physical intimacy. 

8. They bring a friend with them.

We live in an era full of confusions, where a date can actually be a non-date, or the person you fell in love with actually thinks you are their best friend, and nowhere near a romantic interest at all. Listen to your gut feeling and pay attention to the other’s body language. You should “feel” if there is romantic tension or not, and never lie to yourself. Never run after someone that doesn’t want you, because that will damage your confidence and self-respect. Make yourself available for someone that sees how wonderful you are, and actually wants to have romantic dates with you!

The best advice I can give you is to be straightforward. Communicate and simply ask them in a cute way, “Are we going on a date?” with a smile while asking. This should never be an embarrassing thing to do! Better to say it straight up and know where you stand, rather than get hurt after, like my friend Bill did. We were born with mouths to speak and ask what we don’t understand. It’s so easy, but unfortunately we make it complicated for ourselves. Guessing games suck too much happiness away from you. Don’t guess, just ask.

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Valentine’s Day on RTL with Galia Brener

Valentine’s Day on RTL with Galia Brener 398 395 Galia Brener

Thank you dear Lisa Marie Siewert and RTL for the funny and nice interview! To all my friends, family and readers, I wish you a wonderful Valentine’s Day full of happiness, good health and love! Don’t be shy to show your emotions and feelings. Life is short – live now and don’t regret later! Hugs, Gali <3 Please excuse the horrible German! ;-)

 

Read the article here: https://www.galiabrener.com/valentines-day-for-couples-and-singles/

 

 

 

Behind the scenes photos:

 

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Valentine’s Day shooting for RTL

Valentine’s Day shooting for RTL 822 545 Galia Brener

Thank you dear Lisa Marie Siewert from RTL for the funny and nice interview! If you are curious what I said about Valentine’s Day – watch it Friday Feb. 12th at 6pm on RTL Hessen <3

If you are curious about my Valentine’s Day tip for lovers and singles, take a look at my article: https://www.galiabrener.com/valentines-day-for-couples-and-singles/

Behind the scenes photos and shooting done at the Steigenberger Frankfurter Hof.

 

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Valentine’s Day: For couples and singles!

Valentine’s Day: For couples and singles! 822 545 Galia Brener

Dear friends and readers, yesterday I gave an interview to the German television station RTL about Valentine’s Day. I was asked why I think that Valentine’s Day is so important for couples. Of course there are many reasons for that, which I will mention below. However I also brought up the point that Valentine’s Day is not only for couples. In fact, Valentine’s Day can be enjoyed and celebrated being single as well!

 

We live in a really fast-paced society, where feelings and emotions are often hidden on the inside and are suppressed as well! People are scared to get hurt and therefore they are not so quick with letting their true feelings show. Some people are naturally a little bit colder with their feeling than others. That’s where Valentine’s Day becomes so valuable. I know that it’s actually just one day out of the year, and some people make a totally big deal out of it, but I agree with them. This is the one day where it’s ALL ABOUT LOVE! This is a day where being cheesy and corny is ok. When showing feelings and emotions is considered cute. I know that some feminists would kill me when they read this, but this is a day where it’s ok to be an old-fashioned girly woman who is soft, feminine and vulnerable. This is a day where you can actually bake a cake for your love with his name written in pink hearts and glitter, and they won’t think that you’re a psycho manga freak. This is a day for love, when emotions are celebrated and given without regret!

 

I’m sure that with the daily grind and everyday life at work, romance in relationships becomes routine and almost all together forgotten. So thankfully good old V-Day comes a bit over a month after Christmas and New Years, when the holiday stress is over and there is a nice chance to find the path back to each other again. Let’s call it a mini jumpstart to spark up the romance again. I recommend to really take the initiative and plan something über romantic for that day. Maybe a dinner in a nice restaurant, with your hand-written love letter set in front of your partner as a surprise. Or maybe baking a cake naked together and laughing like wild teenagers. Or surprise your man at home with your new lingerie that you bought especially for this day. Maybe a small trip to a romantic city or even a song that you wrote specially for her. The presents must not be expensive, but they must be directly from the heart – to show how much you care. Nothing can be too cheesy on his day! Written poems, a surprise engagement ring, an old photo from your first date in a silver frame, or just cuddling, kissing, movies and love making in bed all day! If you have liked someone for a long time and they don’t know about it, this is also a good day to tell them how you really feel about them! You never know, maybe they feel the same way about you. It’s a day to connect and reconnect.

 

Single on Valentine’s Day? That’s great too! Since this is a day for love – this doesn’t only include romantic love! Why not go for dinner with your best friend and exchange cards that you have written for each other, or small little presents to show how much you cherish your friendship? In fact you can also bake that same cake (maybe not naked? ;-) with your BFF and have fun decorating and eating it together. I have also been know to invite my parents to dinner on Valentine’s Day and tell them how much I love them and am thankful for everything they have done for me! Or even take the time out with your siblings or anyone that means a lot to you. The great thing about Valentine’s Day is that you don’t have to be lonely just because you’re single! This is a day to show gratitude to those in your life that you love, respect and are thankful to have around.

 

Valentine’s Day is about sharing the most valuable thing that you have with the one you love. And what is this valuable thing? It’s your time! You are giving your love and time on this special day to the person who matters a lot to you! Therefore it’s important to cherish this time you have together – because not everything is infinite. You are here now, so enjoy it now.

 

Last but not least, I always say that it would be great to make Valentine’s Day a tradition at least once every month to show your loved one how much they mean to you. Why only limit your display of love, attention and affection to February 14th? Life is not that super long my dear friends. Give your love. Show your feelings. Tell them how you feel. Do the things that are important now, so that you don’t regret later for not doing it – sometimes later it too late. Have a happy, healthy, loving, fun, exciting and passionate Valentine’s Day dear friends and readers! <3

 

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How to “be” on the 1st date

How to “be” on the 1st date 1200 400 Galia Brener

You are standing in front of your closet full of clothes, and of course find nothing to wear. You have a date in 30 minutes! You tried everything on already, and nothing seems to fit right. The little black dress is suddenly too “little”, your favorite skinny jeans are not giving you the long-leg-effect anymore. What is going on? You are nervous because of your hopes and expectations. Let your hair down and relax. Mystery-Man didn’t deserve your worries just yet!

 

I noticed that my best dates were when I didn’t care too much to impress the guy and was just super relaxed. My horror dates were when I was really nervous and tried to appear perfect for the guy. Another mistake I made in the past was to agree with opinions my date had, even though I did not share the same point of view as him. I thought that would make me lovelier, and it would seem that we have more things in common. Wrong. This would eventually catch up with us and fights would occur. Ladies, please voice your opinions, especially if you really like the guy. Don’t be afraid that he thinks you are stupid or silly because of what you say. Most men actually enjoy an intellectual challenge. So let him fight for it girls!

 

Order whatever you feel like eating. Do not worry that you must look cute in front of him by ordering something small that you can eat in single tiny bites. Who cares?! Order a huge pizza if you feel like it. Another funny thing I noticed, the bigger and messier meal you order, the cuter it looks to the guy. Men like women that are not afraid of eating a huge burger or bloody steak. It makes you look real and nonchalant in a positive way. I call this soul food. Eating what makes you happy to satisfy your soul. Everything’s good in good measures – keep a good balance in life.

 

Don’t drink too much alcohol. Getting drunk on a date can cloud your judgment and make you do things you can later regret. I don’t want to sound old-fashioned, but its better if you wait a bit before you have sex with him for the first time. Unless you are just looking for a fun sexy time, that’s ok. What works best for me is to get to know the guy, spend some time with him and let the chemistry and tension rise. Taking your time before having sex will show you if this man wants you for a long-term relationship or just some fun in bed. Men are hunters, so let them hunt and don’t make it too easy for him.

 

Ladies, use your most charming and erotic weapon… your smile! There is nothing more enchanting than an honest, warm and sincere smile. It always works like a charm! During a conversation: look directly into his eyes, give him a seductive smile, drop your gaze down for a second, then look back up at him, and tilt your head to the side. This move kills them!

 

Please do not mention how cool and fabulous you are. Do not show off about all of your achievements on the first date. Avoid the feeling that you must impress him or else he wont like you. If you are an amazing person, then this will be evident in the first hour of the conversation so don’t worry! Let him sweat a bit by trying to impress you. Men like a healthy challenge and want to know that they have the best woman of all – so let him work at charming you into being by his side.

 

Try to keep a relaxed and positive atmosphere. Life is not always a walk in the park, but he doesn’t have to hear about all of your illnesses, debts and tragedies directly on the first date! If you will get closer, then you can open up your heart to him in the future. At the beginning, keep it light and pleasant. Complications are a huge turn off to both men and women. Everyone has their own baggage, so they don’t want to adopt an even heavier load on the first date. The other way around, avoid being an emotional garbage can for those troubled-lost-souls. The broken ones are extremely hard to fix, so unless you want a life-long project instead of being happy, then go for it.

 

If he bores your panties to death, and you need to escape, talk about your ex boyfriend, repeatedly check your mobile phone, write text messages while he is talking to you, and profusely yawn in your seat while slouching. This should do the trick. If you like him, please try to refrain from the above – especially mentioning how large your ex’s, um, water gun was. But to be quite honest, it doesn’t really matter what you do or not do on a date, because if its meant to be, it will be… even if you squeezed the ketchup from the bottle all over his face instead of on your burger! ;-)

 

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Is this a date or not?

Is this a date or not? 1354 437 Galia Brener

Have you ever met with someone that you liked, went for dinner, maybe drinks after or even dancing, and at the end of the evening you get a hug and a friendly smile with a quick “thanks” and “bye”. You are left standing there wondering, “What the hell just happened? Was that even a date? Or does s/he only like me as a friend?” Rest assured that you are not alone and this strange confusion happens quite often.

My friend Bill met a girl that he really liked. They “hung out” and always had fun. They did many things together like go to shows, dinners and parties. However, Jessica never kissed him or showed any physical interest in him. They never spoke about romance or sexual things. Bill thought that she simply needs her time. He was falling for her, and was in denial without wanting to face the truth. This kept on going for a few months, and still nothing happened. I told Bill that even an extremely shy girl would have wanted to kiss him after a few months, given that she was interested in him as more than just friends. Slowly he was starting to realize that these were not “romantic” dates! I told him to ask her straightforward, but he didn’t have the courage and didn’t want to risk pushing her out of his life. He did fall in love with her in the process, and unfortunately got hurt after realizing that she only thought of him as a “friend”. This can be avoided if you pay attention to the following signs:

It’s a date:

1. He reserves a table at a restaurant and pays the bill.

2. S/he acts nervous around you on the first few dates.

3. There is some physical contact during the date – slight touching of forearm, elbow, etc. while talking.

4. You feel the chemistry and tension between you, and he wants / tries to kiss you.

5. S/he asks you a lot of questions, and seems genuinely interested in you, and wants to get to know you better. They show interest!

6. They compliment you in a flirty way.

7. S/he sends you a “Thank you and good night” text after the date.

8. He acts very chivalrous and is a gentleman, and tries to positively impress you.

It’s not a date:

1. S/he asks you to go to a group event, and doesn’t pay much attention exclusively to you.

2. If s/he asks you to “hang out”, and you end up doing something non-romantic at all.

3. Spending time with a colleague and talking mostly about work, without personal questions.

4. If s/he talks a lot about a love interest or a person they like.

5. Talks about their friends, and who would be a good match for you. Or gives you tips about dating, the opposite sex, flirting etc.

6. No effort with their physical appearance. No one wears sweat pants on dates.

7. S/he is not flirting or playful with you, and no kiss or physical intimacy.

8. They bring a friend with them.

We live in an era full of confusions, where a date can actually be a non-date, or the person you fell in love with actually thinks you are their best friend, and nowhere near a romantic interest at all. Listen to your gut feeling and pay attention to the other’s body language. You should “feel” if there is romantic tension or not, and never lie to yourself. Never run after someone that doesn’t want you, because that will damage your confidence and self-respect. Make yourself available for someone that sees how wonderful you are, and actually wants to have romantic dates with you!

The best advice I can give you is to be straightforward. Communicate and simply ask them in a cute way, “Are we going on a date?” with a smile while asking. This should never be an embarrassing thing to do! Better to say it straight up and know where you stand, rather than get hurt after, like my friend Bill did. We were born with mouths to speak and ask what we don’t understand. It’s so easy, but unfortunately we make it complicated for ourselves. Guessing games suck too much happiness away from you. Don’t guess, just ask.

Sex on the first date?

Sex on the first date? 640 250 Galia Brener

We live in an age where traditions have become weaker, rules are not important and anything goes. Sleeping around is not so drastic anymore. Or is it? I have asked many of my male friends what their opinion was on this matter. I was very surprised that 75% of them said that they would rather wait with a girl that they really like, rather than jumping into bed right away with her. Most of them answered: No sex on the first date!

Here are the reasons why the men said “No”:

1. If she sleeps with me on the first date, she probable does that same with all the other men as well. I don’t want to have a girlfriend like that.

2. If you get sex right away, there is nothing left to top it off on the next dates.

3. We are hunters and need a challenge! We want to work for the cookie, and not get it easily right away. There’s no fun or excitement in that.

4. If I really like the girl, then I prefer to get to know her first. This builds up the passion and feelings.

5. This shows she respects herself, and I respect her even more for that.

Wow ladies, now that’s what I call some honest answers. Hope is not completely lost – there are still men out there with a gentleman-like outlook on life that are looking for true love and not just fast sex. This is very encouraging for us!

This brings me to Ambrosia’s story. She met a guy at the gym. He is average height, has dark thick hair and ice-colored blue eyes. He’s been flirting with her for a while now, and two weeks ago he finally made his move and asked her out. She agreed and was quite excited because she was very attracted to him. He took her out for a very nice dinner and show. After they went for drinks and had a perfect evening. She called me from the bathroom and asked if she should take him home with her. My gut feeling told me – No! I advised her to let him walk her to the door, thank him for a wonderful evening, allow him to kiss her, give him a tight hug, smile warmly and go upstairs – alone. She didn’t listen to me and took him home. They drank more upstairs, got drunk and had wild sex. Starting upstairs, the date lost its perfect magical feeling, and was more about the sex. They both enjoyed it very much, but surprise surprise; he didn’t call for days after. He sent her an sms 5 days later, saying he was busy. She summoned up the courage to ask why he was behaving so coldly all of a sudden. No joke, this is what he replied, “Ambrosia, you’re a fun girl, and we had a wild night. But I’m looking for something more serious.” She was shocked. She told him that she also wants something serious, and he said, “Do you do the same thing with every man you go out with on the first night – calling this your serious intention?” Ok I have to admit, the guy seems like a jerk, and used the situation, however it does show that she left a wrong impression on him.

Most men will jump at a chance to sleep with you on the first date, but are willing to wait if they really like you. Sure there are some couples that get together after sex on the first date, and even end up getting married – but the percent is much lower to those that actually take the time to get to know each other first.

Another thing the guys told me was that if he disappears after the first dates without sex and doesn’t stay around to get to know you better, than he was only after the sex. You don’t need such a man always. Ciao and next! Waiting to have sex is a wonderful and natural way of selection to see who is really into you, and who only wants your body for a few nights. Waiting with sex also allows you to build up feelings for the person, which will intensify the first sexual encounter and make it even more phenomenal. Sex with feeling is the best, even on the first time!

I agree with the guys that I interviewed, because in my opinion, I always like to get to know the man before. We live in a world where everything is rushed – and patience is almost nonexistent – so why not work against this system and take the time to get to know this new person in our life? What’s with this insane haste to have sex? Maybe this seems like old-fashioned to you, but why not go back to the courting era where dating actually meant something special, and not just getting into her panties? I see nothing wrong with letting the man romance us first. Going out for dinners and talking into the late night hours – learning to feel for this person, before jumping into bed – is such a nice luxury these days, so why not allow ourselves the time to enjoy this luxury? Most of the men told me that at the beginning, mental stimulation separates the woman who will simply become a sex affair or their next girlfriend. If you’re interested in the man for just a sex fling then go ahead, jump his bones. But for something serious, please take your time. It’s worth the wait and he will respect you even more for it.

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