affair Archives | Galia Brener

Galia Brener
August 2, 2015
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Can sex really be just “casual”?

Can sex really be just “casual”? https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/3_Galis.jpg 1200 400 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g August 2, 2015 November 4, 2016

We live in an unfortunate time where dating different partners is as easy as owning many pairs of shoes. Whenever a newer, sought-after style comes out, we quickly forget the studded-sneaker of last year, and run to the stores to buy something new. As soon as these shoes go out of style, there will surely come something newer, shinier, and prettier… but does that automatically make it better? Just like we change and throw out our shoes, our society has made it acceptable to do the same with partners that we date and sleep with. Why did this become a “made-for-one-time-use-only” disposable generation? Like the answers to a multiple test in school: A, B, C, D, all, or none of the above – we live in a multiple-choice society!

Jules and I went for a Bloody Mary at Vai Vai last week. She told me that she met a nice guy at a party in Frankfurt. That evening they had a long chat about life, relationships, philosophy, and other fascinating topics. After the party, they kept in touch, and have decided to meet again. They had a wonderful evening of delicious food and drinks, and ended up going to his place. This mystery man was fascinated with Jules, kissing her all the way up the stairs to his flat. They laughed, shared some private jokes, and had passionate sex into the early morning hours. After waking up, they had some coffee, and she left. A week has passed, and Jules is still waiting for him to call. Meanwhile, our mystery man has disappeared. For him, it was just casual sex. For her, it was not so casual!

Casual Sex: how do you feel the next morning, after the glittery glamorous butterfly effects of the alcohol has worn off, the make-up is smeared all over the face, the person you shared your body with is sleeping on the other end of the bed, back turned to you, and you feel… empty. The heart wants more. It wants to be hugged, caressed, loved, cuddled and be assured that the world is a beautiful and bright place to live in. But reality strikes when you open your eyes the next morning, and see the look in the other’s face, the looks that says without words, “Please leave my flat, I do not want to deal with you in my bed now… or ever.” That’s the look that makes you get dressed as quickly as possible, leave the scene of the crime, take the torturous walk of shame home, and try to forget that this ever happened. Do we really ever forget these events? Or do they haunt and torture us, taking with them a small piece of our heart, leaving a tiny empty hole.

Expectation management: There are some that simply love sex. They adore the exploration of the body, having a thrilling night of passion and seduction, without any strings attached. They think: why settle down for one, when there can be a new one as often as wanted? Instead of one pair of Louboutin sneakers, why not have 10 in all different colors!? It’s casual sex between two consenting adults – but this should be discussed before jumping into bed, so that nobody gets hurt afterwards. It has been observed that women are more likely to want more from a man after sex, whereas for some men, it is simply casual sex. However, this is not to say that the roles cannot be reversed. But usually women connect on an emotional level, whereas men tend to connect on a physical level.

What must be avoided is leading someone on with fake promises and illusions! This reminds me of a story that Gloria told me once. Years ago, she dated a guy for a few weeks – let’s call him “Fork-Man”. A few summers ago she saw him at a street fest in the city. They had a warm reunion and went to her house for a delicious glass of Barolo and a heart-to-heart conversation. He showered her with promises of a beautiful future together. She was looking into his bright blue eyes, charmed with every word that came out of his mouth. She figured that since they knew each other from the past, he would not lie to her. Gloria gave into his hypnotic tales of a “happy life together” and had sex with him. The next day he got dressed and left. It dawned upon her that his intentions were never true! He disgustingly lied his way into a night of casual sex with her. “Fork-Man” is a Frankfurt banker that comes from a small village. He is an empty walking ghost without happiness and joy for life. His selfishness and anger comes from the fact that he never got the proper love and warmth at home as a child. Therefore he became a bitter man who hurts and uses everyone else. Later, Gloria found out that Fork-Man has been calling and trying to sleep with a friend of hers as well. He knew that both girls know each other!

Saying all of the above, there have been times where casual sex has led to true love. I even know a couple that started dating and got engaged shortly after. Fairytales do come true. Fate is a marvelous thing that can surprise you! But be prepared that if you do have casual sex, the person you slept with might not call you the next day or even the next weeks. That’s the risk you are taking. Even if for you it was special, for him/her it might only be “casual” sex and nothing more.

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Galia Brener
June 12, 2015
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Don’t date married people!

Don’t date married people! https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Tegernsee.jpg 1200 400 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g June 12, 2015 November 4, 2016

Image this scenario: It’s a Thursday night, and your friends drag you out for a drink. You’ve had a tough week, and don’t feel like mingling and being amongst people. You try to refuse, but they don’t take no for an answer. You stand in front of your closet, trying to choose something decent to wear, but your heart is simply not in it. You throw on your can’t-go-wrong-dress, put on your high-yet-comfy heels, and leave the house. You feel yourself regretting every step that brings you further away from your comfortable couch. The girls take you to a trendy new bar, and suddenly it starts to look up, because you realize that you can drown your sorrows in a strong gin tonic! You slowly sip your drink and look around. A man approaches you and sits on the bar stool beside you. He’s absolutely drop-dead gorgeous. He starts talking to you, and you soon feel yourself melting away. He’s charming, warm, kind, sweet, and intelligent… and he wants to take you out to dinner on the weekend. You go home happier than ever.

Saturday is here, and you’re nervous as hell! You’re meeting “him” tonight! You look fabulous, and so does he. You have an absolutely amazing evening together. You feel the butterflies fly wildly around in your stomach, and your heart starts singing love songs to your brain. This date is followed by many more wonderful dates. Everything is simply perfect and you are both very happy. You feel that he’s the one, and tell him that you love him. He hugs you tightly and says that he loves you too… but there is something that he has to tell you. He hasn’t told you this yet because he was scared to lose you. Your heart skips a beat, and almost stops. Your stomach lurches, as if you are sailing through 10-meter high waves, hanging on for dear life. What the hell does he need to tell you?

He’s married. You love him. He says he loves you. He doesn’t want to lose you, and tries to convince you to stay with him. You try not to see him for a few days, to gather distance from him. But you cannot. You need to see him, to kiss and hug him. You need to hear his voice, feel his closeness, his touch, his arms wrapped around you. But like it or not, you are now the “other woman”. The longer you date him, the harder it will be for you to leave. In the bottom of your heart and soul, you know that letting him go would be the better and smarter thing to do…. but it’s so damn hard!

Most men that have affairs do not leave their wives for the “other woman”. Same thing goes for married women. Even if he does leave his wife, there is no guarantee that he won’t do the same thing with you, and the next woman after you. An acquaintance of mine, Maria, was dating a married man. She wanted to leave him but couldn’t. She was crazy about him. He kept on promising her to leave his wife, year after year. After 5 years, he still did not leave his wife, and he never did after. Maria ended up wasting 5 years with a man that was sharing his heart with two women. He told her that he doesn’t sleep with his wife anymore, and doesn’t even love her, but still he did not make an attempt to start a new life with Maria! She met him at 35 years old, and is now 40 with a broken heart and wasted time.

Dating married people is like being stuck with a bad Internet connection, and waiting for your favorite online store to load. Usually the page fails to load up, and the slow Internet crashes. You are putting your life on hold for a man/women that “might”, but most likely never will be yours. No matter how you try to justify it to yourself: “It really is true love”, or “S/he truly loves me”, “We are soul mates because we understand each other so well”… at the end of the day, a family is being wrecked. There is another woman on the other side who is miserable and suffering. She is trying to do everything do get her husband to notice her again. It’s an awful, painful and torturous feeling. Ask yourself this: can you truly love someone who is so disrespectful to his wife and family? He is having his cake and eating it too. Two women who want him, and he gets to decide what, where, when and with whom. Be honest to yourself, is this the life you really want?

I have seen a few friends suffer like never before. My advice to you would be to never start dating anyone who is married, and if you happen to find out later, break it off immediately. You will save your heart, soul, and a family! If s/he did this “with you”, then s/he will do this “to you” as well. Karma is also at risk here. You don’t want the same thing happening to you when you are married! Drop them and take care of yourself. You deserve a wonderful person that will fall in love with you, and make you their one-and-only! You deserve the very best, and do not need to share your partner with anyone else. Be smart and choose to lead an honest, honorable and happy life.

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Galia Brener
October 10, 2014
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Are you his sex toy or his next girlfriend?

Are you his sex toy or his next girlfriend? https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Gali_feature_Antibes.jpg 1354 437 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g October 10, 2014 November 5, 2016

I have received many letters from women asking me how to tell if a guy has long-term intentions for them, or if he’s simply looking for a sex fling? This can be quite tricky because some people are willing to go to any measure, including selling white lies about a happy future together, just to get the girl in bed. I have asked many of my male friends about this, and almost all told me that when they first meet a girl, they can tell within the first hour of talking to her if she will be just a fling, or a future girlfriend. Luckily there are a few hints at the beginning, which let you know and feel if he only wants you for sex, or to be his girlfriend.

My friend Sandy had to learn this the hard way. Half a year ago she met a guy at a bar, and they hit it off quite well. They talked for a while, and ended the evening by kissing, but Sandy went home alone. She didn’t want to rush things and jump into bed with him because she liked him, and didn’t want it to be just about sex. He wasn’t happy that she didn’t want to sleep with him, but she didn’t notice that in her tipsy state. This was on a Wednesday evening, and she was sure that he would call or write on the weekend, but he didn’t. The next week on Tuesday he wrote her, asking to meet on Wednesday. I said that he’s not serious about her, otherwise he would have at least written a short message on the weekend asking how she’s doing. Sandy tried to brush it off by saying he’s probably busy.

They met on Wednesday and had dinner, went for drinks and then she took him home. She told him that she doesn’t want a fling but rather a relationship, and he said, “Sure, that’s what I want to.” They finally had sex, and it was “ok”, but nothing earth-shattering or mind blowing. Still, Sandy was lusting for him, and his smell played havoc with her brain. He was smart enough, but not the most intelligent man for deep conversations, so the dates were not the best ones she had. However, he “teased” her of a future together, also mentioning holidays and places he wanted to visit with her. His extremely attractive “outer shell” hooked her as well. The next morning he left, and this time she didn’t hear from him for almost an entire week. This was horrible for her because they had sex for the first time together. She wrote him a sweet sms, and it took him days to answer! I told her that this is just sex for him, and he’s not serious about her. She refused to listen to me. This fling lasted for 3 months of them seeing each other once a week, never on the weekends, and not getting closer emotionally at all. Sandy became sad and tired of his ways, and told him that this was not going anywhere. And guess what? He didn’t even try to keep her. He just let her go and she never heard from him again. She later found out that he had many other girls, with whom he was doing the same thing at the same time.

Here are two lists to show you the difference of what he really wants from you:

If he wants you only for sex or a fling:

1. He will text you only when he needs to fill his time once or twice a week, or is feeling hot and horny and needs a release. He keeps the communication to a minimum, only enough to keep you hooked and get sex from you.

2. When you meet him, you feel that your time together is very limited.

3. After a date you never know if that’s the last time you see him. He doesn’t make short-term or long-term plans with you.

4. Even if you say no, he still pushes too much to have sex with you when you’re making out.

5. He doesn’t take you along to places and evenings with his friends and family. You don’t get integrated into his life.

6. If you have problems, he doesn’t offer to help, and doesn’t really seem interested in your issues. He might even change the topic of conversation, or react inadequately to something that bothers you. If you’re sick, he tells you to get better and meet after you’re healthy again.

7. He does everything only for his convenience, and goes only where he wants. If he doesn’t like a place or event you mention, he won’t go there, even if he knows that it would make you happy.

8. He speaks mostly about himself, his life, his hobbies and his passions. He doesn’t ask you much about you and your life. He doesn’t care to ask about your friends and family.

9. When going out together, his eyes will be darting all over the place, looking at other women.

If he wants you to be his girlfriend:

1. He will write and call to see how you are doing – usually everyday, or every second day – because he cares and wants to stay in contact with you. He writes longer sentences, because he wants to keep a strong and constant communication with you.

2. He makes enough time to see you and be with you, because he wants to have you by his side.

3. Even during the date, he’s already mentioning the next time you meet, what you could do together, what you can see or experience together. He’s thinking long-term with you.

4. When you’re making out and you say no to sex, he’s a gentleman and doesn’t push you for more. He respects your wishes because he wants to keep you by his side.

5. He takes you to meet his friends, and also to meet his family. He’s proud to have you with him.

6. He listens carefully if you tell him about a problem you’re having, and offers his help right away. If you’re sick, he will bring you chicken soup. He’s there for you and cares about you.

7. Even if he hates the opera, street fests, or a certain party, restaurant or bar, he will go there with you because he knows that you like it, and it will make you happy.

8. He’s interested in your life, and asks many questions about you, your passions and goals in life. He’s interested about your family and friends, and wants to integrate himself into your life.

9. He will have eyes only for you, and you wont see him constantly looking at other women.

Ladies, I know how hard it is to admit to ourselves that the guy we like is not serious about us, but if you’re not honest with yourself, you will get hurt like my friend Sandy did. Open your eyes and hearts, and see what he really wants from. The best is to ask him what his intentions are for you. Straightforward communication is always important. If he’s lying, like in Sandy’s case, then you have to figure it out for yourself. We are women, and have a strong intuition. Let’s be honest, we feel and know right away what the man truly wants from us. But we lie to ourselves thinking that we can make him see our inner beauty and fall in love with us, and this is how we get hurt. So next time please keep your antennae up to see what he really wants from you. If you’re looking for a boyfriend, then make sure to follow my second list, and see if he behaves accordingly! Don’t allow yourself to be used sexually and emotionally, because you deserve better than that. You deserve real love.

Web: www.facebook.com/yesnomaybegalia

Galia Brener
September 22, 2014
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You’re having an affair?

You’re having an affair? https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Feature_Image.jpg 514 193 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g September 22, 2014 November 5, 2016

We live in a world where things move faster than the speed of light – unfortunately sometimes, even love as well. Values are being replaced with smartphones, and morals are sniffed up the nose in forms of white powders. Wives cheat on Tinder, and husbands run to prostitutes. What is left from the old-fashioned thing, once called “true love”? I’m sure you have all heard of horror stories about affairs amongst your friends, or have seen it in movies. So I ask myself, how many of those cheating affairs actually have a happy ending?

My friend Gloria met a man two years ago. “B-Liar” was exceptionally handsome, tall with dark blond hair and piercing blue eyes. He was very charming, and quite the smooth operator. He was flawless, and even more beautiful than the painting of Dorian Gray. Oscar Wilde would do flips in the air if he saw B-Liar. He was quite generous, and invited Gloria on a holiday the first month they met. She noticed that he always put his phone face down on the table, and kept it on silent or closed most of the time. She didn’t think much of it, only that he was trying to spend quality time with her, without interruptions. Yeah right. When they came back, he spent many wonderful evenings in her flat, but always left early in the morning and never had much time on the weekends for her – saying that he’s busy, or must work at the office during the weekend. He also never took her to his flat – making an excuse that it’s being renovated, and that he lives in a hotel at the “moment”. The months passed by and she was already very deeply in love with him. She said, “Gali, I know that he’s the one! I feel it so deep inside, I’m sure of it!”

One evening, I was at the beautiful Christmas market in Frankfurt, enjoying a hot warm glass of Feuerzangenbowle with the girls. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mr. B-Liar walk by, hugging Gloria. As I was approaching them from behind, I saw that they started kissing very passionately in front of the Christmas tree. I was so happy for my dear Gloria. Being the silly monkey that I am, I jumped on her and gave her a huge bear hug from behind. What happened next was the shock of a lifetime for me! She turned around, and it was not Gloria! She looked at me like I just dropped down form the moon, and I accidentally spilled my entire Feuerzangenbowle on B-Liar. He introduced her as his wife, and I was shocked and speechless! He looked very scared and begged me with his eyes not to say anything. His wife was very confused, and I realized it was time to make my exit. I told the girls I have to leave, and went straight to Gloria’s flat. I felt so miserable. How the hell should I tell my good friend such horrendous news, when she thinks he’s the one? I bought a bottle of Belvedere on the way, because I knew this would be a tough evening for my poor sweet darling.

I told Gloria that B-Liar is married. It hurt me so much to see the gruesome pain settle in her eyes and heart. It was a gut-wrenching night, one of the worst I’ve ever had. I have never heard someone cry with so much agony. How could he have hidden it for so many months from her? Of course he tried to blind her with the usual, “I don’t love her anymore, and we don’t have sex at all. It’s too expensive to get a divorce at the moment. I will leave her soon, you’re the only one for me. I love you so much baby” bullshit! However, Gloria loved him to death, and couldn’t let him go. He showered her with promises to leave his wife. She waited and waited, and wanted him even more. She cries often now, and happiness has not visited her heart for a while. She is living on standby. It’s horrific to see my friend so broken! I tell her to leave him, and stop this insanity at once! But she doesn’t, because he promised to be with her. Well, it’s been almost two years now and nothing has changed. Gloria is the other woman. His promises are empty, and only fuel her false hope of a happy future together. But like with most affair cases, he will never leave his family.

Ladies, and also gentlemen – it happens often the other way around as well – please save yourself the excruciating pain, and don’t get involved with a married person. Very rarely do these people leave their partners for their lovers. And if they do, there is a huge chance that s/he will cheat on you as well – once a cheater, always a cheater. Besides, you don’t want to be that bitch who broke up a family and brought evil into someone’s life. This is bad karma – and you don’t want to mess with that. I read somewhere that karma-wise, if you have and affair with a married person, the same can come back to you later on, and your future partner might have an affair as well. That’s horrible, and you don’t need this to happen to you. There are enough single people out there these days for us. If you are dating someone and didn’t know about this, like Gloria, my advice would be to stop the affair right away. Sure you will miss them, and feel pain for a while, but it’s a pain with an end, rather than being stuck in an affair with endless pain. You will eventually get over it and move on. If you stay in the affair, you will block your possibility of finding true love with someone that can actually be yours! No good comes out of affairs, and almost all of them have a very bitter ending. Life is short, is that what you wish for yourself? Make yourself available for the one who will be “your” sweetheart. Don’t you deserve the best?

Web: www.facebook.com/yesnomaybegalia

Galia Brener
August 29, 2014
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Gali, the Tinder police.

Gali, the Tinder police. https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Gali_feature_mirror.jpg 1354 437 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g August 29, 2014 November 5, 2016

Dear cheaters, I’m sorry to have to do this, but you had enough of selfish dirty “fun” on the side. It’s time to bring the darkness out to face the light. Actually I’m not sorry at all for doing this. For those that know me well, know that I’m a warrior of love, and absolutely despise cheating. I think it’s the most cowardly thing to do when in a relationship. It’s egotistical, weak and extremely unkind! The act of cheating shows that a person has zero respect and compassion towards their partner and themselves. Thank you Tinder, for showing us who these people are.

During my few months on Tinder, I was astonished to see how many men are on there that are married or have wonderful girlfriends, which I know! I have discovered many men, from advertising agencies owners, to hotel, club and restaurant owners, to “kind” doctors, teachers and other “humanitarians” – all cheaters, without a soul or care about the pain they cause their partners. And it’s not only the men. There are exactly as many women cheaters on Tinder, trying to pull a few nasty orgasms on the side, while their husbands are away on business trips, working hard to bring home some money and give them a good life! What the hell is happening to this world? Are there no more morals, values and loyalty out there? I’ve always been old-fashioned, but have I missed the moment where fidelity became a thing of the past? Is it not cool anymore to be faithful to one partner, or has the world become so narcissistic that we need to have sex with 5 people at the same time, including our partner, just to prove to ourselves that we are still hot and wanted? I don’t get it, and I don’t even want to know, because I think it’s horrible and cruel. Ladies and gentlemen, we are moving further into the future, but it’s really time to bring back some solid old values. If you can’t be faithful, then don’t be in a relationship. Basta.

Another person I discovered on Tinder last week was the boyfriend of a very good friend of mine, Michelle. She’s a kind, wonderful, beautiful, intelligent and funny woman. Any guy should be happy and proud to have her by his side – except her asshole man, who I caught surfing Tinder shamelessly, looking to sleep around. I was there when Michelle met her guy some years ago, at a beautiful gala in Frankfurt. They laid eyes on each other, and she thought that he’s “The One”. They planned a wonderful future together, and she was waiting for the ring and proposal any day now. Last month they bought a flat in Westend together. It’s a flat to die for, but unfortunately those walls will not be hearing Michelle’s laughter. Instead of being the Wonderful-“One”-till-death-do-you-part, he turned out to be “The One” who bitterly hurt and humiliated her. Why buy a 1.7-Million Euro flat in Frankfurt for your happy life together, and then cheat on Tinder? The crazy thing is that two women sent me an email yesterday, saying that they have been “dating” this same greasy coward at the same time! What a mess!

This is how you can find out if your “loving” partner is cheating on you on Tinder (for both men and women). If you truly trust your partner, then don’t do it. If you feel something is fishy, then try it. I must warn you, be careful what you look for, because those who seek often find. The truth is not always nice.

1. Create a fake account on Facebook
2. Upload some beautiful photos (not of you of course) – make sure they look real and are not model/campaign photos.
3. Download Tinder, and create a profile.
4. Swipe, swipe, swipe, until you either find your partner or not. It’s a game of Russian roulette. You might be one of the lucky ones that have a good love on your side, who still has morals and is faithful.
5. If you do find your partner, click the match heart.
6. If s/he doesn’t click the match heart back, at least you now know that they are on Tinder.
7. If you get a “match” with your partner, then make a date with them, and give them a surprise from hell – where they are from.
8. This is a rough test, but it’s better to find out sooner than later. Always know that you deserve the best, and should have someone in your life that truly loves you, and wants to be only with you!

Even if these people are not meeting anyone on Tinder for sex, and are just “testing the waters”, this is actually the beginning of the end. If you think there’s something better out there for you, don’t waste your partner’s time and drag them along, while you’re “window shopping” for someone else! This is cruel and shameful. Let me remind the cheaters once again that Lady Karma is out there, and likes to get her revengeful claws deep into the flesh, digging out the heart and guts, full of dirty blood and tears. Cruelty will not go unpunished. If one causes pain to others, then it will come back to them – but much worse. So be aware. Karma doesn’t miss anyone. Sometimes it takes days or years, but she always manages to get her job done! So, liar liar pants on fire – get your ass off of Tinder, build up some courage, and do the decent human thing – talk to your partner and straighten things out! Either you are faithful or breakup, but don’t destroy a good person just because of your disgusting selfish need for cheap fast sex.

Galia Brener
August 8, 2014
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Know your worth!

Know your worth! https://www.galiabrener.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Feature_Image.jpg 514 193 Galia Brener Galia Brener https://secure.gravatar.com/avatar/93df0625fa48660aad1c99698d5d7757?s=96&r=g August 8, 2014 March 16, 2015

Everyone wants true love, even though many are too proud or embarrassed to admit it. They think that saying they need love might sound desperate, but it doesn’t. Love is the magic ingredient that makes life so much better, shinier and brighter. The only problem these days is that since sex is so easy to get, love has become harder to find! Some girls make themselves easily available for men to take and use as they wish. Then these men believe that this is possible with all girls, and so the vicious circle begins! The question is ladies, how much are you willing to sacrifice of yourself to get love and attention from a man? Even if he treats you badly, and you know you deserve better?

My friend Claudia learned this the hard way. Some months ago she met an extremely attractive man whom she quickly fell for. They only saw each other once a week, but she wanted to spend more time with him. As his nickname suggests, he played it very cool and had no time for her. He would take a day or two to answer her text messages, and almost never called her. He would wait last minute to make plans with her, and kept her waiting on hold quite often. However, when they did meet, it was quite nice. He would usually come to her place after their date, and they would have intense passionate sex. Strangely though, as cold and distant as he was, he would take her in his arms and cuddle after sex, and they would sleep the entire night in each other’s arms. Sometimes they also watched a movie and cuddled all evening. The next day he would leave, and as usual Claudia wouldn’t hear from him for a week. Some of his actions showed that he “might” want more, but deep down Claudia knew that he was just playing her, yet she continued to be in denial.

One evening they went to a party, and everyone was having a great time. Claudia had a glass of Prosecco too much, and felt the liquid courage to talk to Mr. Cold about how she felt. She told him straight up that she didn’t want to have a fling, affair or anything meaningless with him. She was on the market for true love, and nothing less than that! Mr. Cold was quite drunk himself and said he didn’t know what he wants, but really liked spending time with her! And so this “thing” whatever it was that they were having, continued. A few months passed and the situation was not getting better. He barely gave her once a week of his time, and he always disappeared on the weekends. It became worse. He would call during late hours and ring her doorbell at 4am, waking her and the entire building up! He would stand underneath her windows at night, convincing her that he must come upstairs, or begging her to come down for “just” a kiss.

It was obvious that he wanted her body, but not her heart. Claudia felt disgustingly used, like a whore who he came to fuck at night and leave in the morning. Every time he left her place she would hate herself a bit more. Mr. Cold was excruciatingly good looking, like Oscar Wilde’s Dorian Gray. She loved to look at him underneath her, while she was riding him in bed. But his beauty was not enough for such a sacrifice of her honor! She wanted to have a family, and give herself to a man who actually made the effort to commit to a real future with her. I was so angry, and told her to throw this “Cold-Garbage” away, and get some self-respect! Never ever allow a man to use you like this!

A warning to you good women out there: unfortunately Mr. Cold is a common type these days. These kind of men are simply out there to use good women, get what they want in bed, and run away. Do not compromise yourself for such a man, because you will get hurt! If you want something real and long-term, keep that as a target in your life. Men like Mr. Cold will only set you back, and make you feel worthless and used. You are not a doormat or a hotel for a quick layover! The most important thing to realize is that it is impossible to change someone like Mr. Cold, and make him think that he wants a relationship. Even if you manage to “trap” him into this, he will end up cheating and/or leaving. It’s not worth it. If you want something more meaningful than just cheap-sex, make sure you know your worth and not side-track yourself with a parasite like Mr. Cold. Save your love and kindness for a man who will actually appreciate and deserve it. If a man wants you for something serious, then he will show this to you! A good man will not waste your time for months without a commitment. Men are not stupid, and know exactly what they want, and whom they want it with – so know your worth and don’t sell yourself for less!

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