PHILOSOPHY OF LIFE

Don’t take your partner for granted!
Don’t take your partner for granted! 1354 437 Galia Brener

The weekend has arrived, and it’s finally time for some fun! You reserve a table at your favorite Italian restaurant, and make yourself pretty for your man. Unfortunately when you leave the house, he doesn’t say anything about how you look. Damn it, another wasted effort. You arrive at your table and order a bottle of wine. After your second glass, you see a couple entering the restaurant holding hands. The handsome man leads his special lady to the table, pulls back her chair and helps her with her coat. While waiting for your food to arrive, you observe them laughing in the most intimate way. After a few minutes the guy leans over, kisses her passionately on the lips, and takes her hand into his. You sigh, turn back to your man and ask, “Baby, why don’t you kiss me like that anymore?” He laughs and says, “Come on, these two have just started dating, can’t you see that?” When their champagne arrives, and you hear the man telling his woman, “Happy 7 year anniversary my love!” You sigh again – deeper and sadder this time. You realize that he is taking you for granted.

This reminds me of Claudia and her ex. When they first met, he was literally Prince Charming out of a fairytale. He took her out to dinner in beautiful places under the starry sky. He wrote her little romantic notes and hid them all over her flat. He would surprise her with flowers and chocolates. He would write her the sweetest good night/morning messages, which was the first thing she saw each day. In return, she also did many wonderful things for him. They were so happy, and it seemed like nothing else existed apart from their love for each other. As time went by, Claudia’s ex started to “get used” to having her around. He stopped giving her compliments, and noticing her effort to look good for him. The sex in their relationship disappeared almost completely, and on their anniversary he didn’t even bother to get her flowers. He took her more and more for granted each passing month. He didn’t pay her much attention, and was irritated when they talked. He was often in a bad mood, and took it out on her. This was extremely painful for Claudia, and she started to back away emotionally from him. Eventually they broke up and a wonderful man appeared in her life, which has been incredibly wonderful to her ever since. Her ex realized what a mistake he made, and tried desperately to get her back. Unfortunately it was too late, because he took her for granted and lost her. He still cannot forget her, because he now understands how much she truly loved him.

What does it mean to take your partner for granted? It means that one does not fully appreciate the other person for what they are, what they do for them, and what they bring into the relationship. It also means that one doesn’t notice the importance of the other, and doesn’t acknowledge the love being given to them. Basically it comes down to the fact that one partner doesn’t really value the other anymore. Unfortunately almost all of us are a bit guilty of taking our partner for granted, without always being aware of this! Think back to when you first met your love, and how amazing the first year was. Remember the fireworks in your stomach, and the way your heart skipped a beat when you thought of them? The more we forget this, the more our love is in danger of dying. It’s time to wake up, become aware, and fix the problem. How, you ask?

Thankfully this is easier to fix than you think! You can start right away by trying this out:

1. Telling her more often how beautiful she is. Or how handsome he is. Compliments in general are very good! Don’t be cheap on the nice words.
2. Buy her flowers more often. Do it for no reason at all, just to let her know you care.
3. Look into her eyes and tell her you love her more often. I promise that it won’t lose its meaning.
4. Don’t flirt, stare or look back at other women. That hurts!
5. Tell him how much you appreciate his help, and of course compliment him and his strength. Never forget “Please” and “Thank you”. Show that his efforts mean a lot to you.
6. No matter how busy you are, make time to spend together, and invite her out for dinner dates, just like when you first started dating.
7. Make as much time for sex as possible. When this is neglected, your partner automatically feels unwanted and unattractive.
8. Never stop the kissing! It’s not called the “French Kiss” for nothing. It keeps the passion going.
9. Pay attention to each other when speaking. Listen and help. Be there for your partner through ups and downs, by being their best friend!
10. Do not cheat. This is the beginning of the end.
11. Don’t just take from your partner, give back as well! Show your appreciation with deeds.
12. If she’s sick, be there for her. Be empathetic, understanding and caring.
13. If he has stress at work or with his family, lay him down on your lap and caress him. Sometimes a soothing massage is better than words. Show him you care about what’s going on in his life.
13. Have fun! Like in the beginning, go on spontaneous dates, trips, get drunk together and sing underneath the moon. Do something wild and mischievous together.
14. Don’t snap at each other, or use nasty tones. Control your temper, and show respect – especially while arguing. Do not take your bad mood or anger out on your partner.
15. Send her a short romantic SMS during the day. Leave a naughty post-it in his gym bag.
16. Get each other small gifts for no special reason – just to show your appreciation.
17. Do something that maybe you don’t necessarily like, but you know it pleases your partner – like going to the opera, or on a romantic hotel weekend.
18. Help each other with the housework. Sing or dance while doing it, its super fun!
19. Cook something delicious for him. A well-fed man is a happy man.
20. Give her enough attention! Women are like flowers – give them attention and they blossom!

Gentlemen don’t forgot that there are many wonderful men out there who would be more than glad to make your woman happy and give her what you don’t! Same goes the other way around for women. Take a few minutes and think when was the last time you did something from the 20 points above. I always say that it’s never too late to change and make your relationship better. If this love is special, then make sure you do all you can to keep it happy and healthy.

Want to heal your broken heart?
Want to heal your broken heart? 1354 437 Galia Brener

Like I always say, love is a bitch. She mysteriously appears out of no where, forces herself into your nicely balanced life, punches you in the face until you are drunk enough not to know anything anymore, and makes you helplessly addicted to her high. Unfortunately this bitch also has the habit of disappearing, leaving you with a half-beating shattered heart, and a painful anxiety that you would not even wish upon the devil himself. This is a very serious issue, and I will be quite harsh in this article. It’s about survival, and the necessity to heal and move on.

A few months ago, I met up with the girls for a delicious Sunday brunch. The door to the restaurant opened, and Jilli walked in, looking very upset. Her eyes were swollen, and she looked like she was about to collapse at any second. I felt my heart skip a beat because I knew something was very wrong. She looked up at us, her beautiful turquoise eyes filled with tears, and said, “We broke up.” I almost spilled my hot coffee allover myself. Jilli and her now “ex” boyfriend were our example that true love really does exist. We considered them to be the “perfect couple”, and deeply in love. My sunny-side up eggs arrived, but I couldn’t eat them. I took a bite, and felt the egg sticking to my throat. I asked her what happened. This question made Jilli’s tears roll violently down her face, and she told us that he didn’t want to commit to her. He didn’t want to marry or have a family with her. He said he wasn’t ready, and didn’t know if he ever would be. But she was not even pressuring him to marry her now! She said they were fighting a lot lately, because she was seeking his attention and love, and he was pushing her away. Not only that, he became vicious to her lately, and was saying and doing things that really hurt her. How could this asshole betray such a special love? Poor Jilli, she was so sure that he was her soulmate. She never loved another human being like she loved him.

She asked me what to do, because she knows my story from many years ago. I’ve had my heart brutally destroyed once as well. Like Jilli, I thought that my world was demolished, and what I loved was being ripped out of my body alive. Months went by, and the pain did not subside. One day while crying in the kitchen, something strange happened; for a millisecond, I felt deep inside myself that if I wont finally deal with this crap, it will deal with me – in a very bad way. Constant painful emotions can lead to physical illness. The hard truth is that nobody needs a sick person. This brought out the fear, and self-protection in me, and I finally woke up. I entered survival-mode.

How did I heal my broken heart? I started loving myself more than I loved him. That’s it. That’s the secret. What does this mean? It means that soulmate or not, you have to take all the love you have for him, and turn it upon yourself, because you must survive this terror. You have no other choice, because if you don’t switch survival-mode on, this pain might destroy you. I have seen people turning to angry bitter monsters because of broken hearts. I have even heard of people falling into deep helpless depressions, and not coming out of it for years! Is that what you want? To be stuck in hell for years obsessing about some jerk that didn’t even think you were worthy enough to stay together with? That’s abandonment and betrayal, and such a person is not entitled to your love – you are the one who deserves your love now, so make the switch.

Loving yourself more means living for yourself. Take the first few months to be selfish by doing what you want, and when you want it. Your friends and family will understand if you explain to them. Learn to say “No” to others. Loving yourself is also controlling yourself – your thoughts and emotions. As soon as you think of how you miss him, counteract the thought with a thought of a bad thing that he did to you. Remember the bad stuff? It was not only rainbows. Loving yourself is being strong. You can cry for some weeks, but one day you have to get up, find your courage and start respecting yourself again. Loving yourself means fighting for yourself to become happy again. It means not letting yourself sink in the misery of your negative and depressive feelings. If he was weak and didn’t fight for you, doesn’t mean that you also have to be weak and not fight for yourself. If you have a dog or a child, would you allow someone to hurt them, while standing and watching? No! You would jump in, and save them from this evil. Well, imagine yourself jumping in and saving yourself. That’s what you have to do now, save yourself.

Life is too damn short to cry over idiots who take us for granted, don’t appreciate us, and actually do not even deserve us. Never ever give your power away by letting someone bring you down so low, that you cannot feel “happiness” anymore. How the hell does he still deserve love from you after hurting you like that? You deserve your own love now. By rolling around in your broken-hearted misery, you are actually hurting yourself – just like he did to you! That’s psychologically wrong, and doesn’t make any sense. Think about it… ♥

12 things happy single girls do
12 things happy single girls do 1354 437 Galia Brener

I will be direct and not spare any feelings in this article. Life is short and you should live, enjoy and be happy while you can (single or not). Last night sitting on my couch, I realized that absolutely everything in life is pretty much temporary – either longer or shorter periods of time, but never forever. That’s why it’s time for us to wake the hell up and start living a happy live NOW.

1. Sports. Happy girls are balanced girls. I do yoga because it gives me peace at heart, and keeps me sane, especially when I have stressful and difficult situations to deal with. I enter the yoga school with thoughts about everything, and exit with an empty mind. It’s worth gold to just breathe and not think about your crap for a while. Sports help us stay healthy, beautiful, and allow our brain to rest from the constant mind fuck that we put it through.

2. Take care of themselves. Single does not mean dead. Happy single girls continue to shave their sweet parts, and take the best care of their hair, nails and skin. They take vitamins to boost their immune system, never miss a teeth cleaning at the dentist, and make sure they go to the gynecologist to get everything checked up. Happy single girls love and make themselves their own top priority. To be brutally honest, and what I’ve heard from people’s situations, is that nobody needs a sick partner.

3. Spend time with friends and family. Life is not only about romantic love, and having a partner. Single happy girls are grateful for every opportunity to spend time with the ones dear to them. They appreciate the true gifts in life – of having a best friend, and family that love them like no one else does. Remember my words: everything is temporary – and parents will not be here forever. Spend as much time with them as you can… before it’s too late.

4. Shopping. No boyfriend? No problem! Being single leaves you with more money to spend on yourself. Spoiling yourself is a privilege that you should get used to. However, also saving a bit every month is very important because it gives you financial freedom, which is a bloody amazing feeling!

5. Spend time alone. Spending time alone is very peaceful for me. I sometimes lock myself in for the entire weekend, and watch DVDs, write my articles, pig out on Russian pilmeni, sort out my closet, do some facial masks, sleep, rest, read, draw, and the list goes on. A single happy girl must be able to spend time on her own. Life is not over if you have no boyfriend, quite the opposite actually, it gives you time to relax and do the stuff you love – whenever and how long you want to.

6. Let go. Single happy girls let go of expectations and pressure to meet a guy. They know and have faith that the right man will come when the time is right, and not stress themselves and their friends about it. Single happy girls are confident, know their own worth, and are never desperate. They don’t take any shit from a man, and would rather be single than together with a schmuck.

7. Live in the present. Happy girls are not stuck in the past with thoughts of how amazing the time with their ex-boyfriend was, while shedding painful tears. They also don’t dwell too much in the future thinking how happy they will be when they finally find their true love. Happy girls live in the present, because they know that life can pass by in a blink of an eye. Living in the past in a crazy illusion – it’s not real, and a ridiculous waste of time.

8. Get enough sleep. A well-rested girl is a happy girl. Never underestimate the power of sleep! The body regenerates itself during sleep, which means better skin, rested calm nerves, no dark circles under the eyes and more energy. This all contributes to a daily happy-feeling. The great thing about being single is having the bed all to yourself. Plus there is nobody snoring beside you, keeping you awake and irritated all night.

9. Optimism. Happy single girls stay optimistic. No matter what hardship they have been through in life, they keep their strength and don’t let anything break them or kill their spirit. Nobody on this planet is worth your damaged nerves and health. The happy girl will see all bad occurrences as an opportunity to better herself, learn a life lesson and grow. Winners are able to create their own happiness – it’s your own choice!

10. Commit to goals. Happy single girls don’t have time to complain about how lonely they are, because they actually have goals to achieve in their life. Instead of wallowing in miserable self-pity, happy women get off their ass and achieve something! They complain less, and accomplish more.

11. Surround themselves with happy people. Happiness attracts happiness. Likewise negativity attracts misery. Get rid of all the energy vampires in your life. You know those people that always have dramas and complain about everything? They are toxic. No matter how much you try to motivate and help them, they never learn. Happy single girls stay away from these people, and have friends that are positive, successful and well-balanced.

12. Happy single girls know how to masturbate well! They have perfect knowledge how to pleasure themselves and are not afraid to explore their own body. They know exactly where to touch themselves, how to do it, and what they need to reach an Earth-shattering orgasm. Happy girls have a great collection of vibrators, and are not afraid to use them!

So it’s really up to you… do you want to be happy or not?

Where is he already?!
Where is he already?! 1354 437 Galia Brener

It’s Saturday afternoon and you decide to spend some hard-earned money on a little treat for yourself. As you wander through the city, you can’t help but notice the couples everywhere. Every few meters you see them walking happy, as if these bloody lovers are on a mission to show off in front of you today. The handholding, the smiles and whispers, the shared secrets, the kissing and the passion. Is it your imagination, or does it seem like everyone in the fucking city is in love, and you’re left out? Damn it, where is he already? As you feel a tug on your heart the only way to fill that hole, at this very moment, is to make that “little” present for yourself not “so little.” You end up coming home with expensive shoes, or a new exhaust pipe for your Harley. It makes you feel happy… but maybe for about a week.

There is a rumor going around about a mysterious lady called Destiny. Apparently they say that when she decides the time is right, she sends you love. Sometimes you must go through hell and suffering, while gaining life lessons to be prepared for true love. Other times you have a mission to accomplish before the right one comes. Either way, Madame Destiny calls the shots, and therefore this tough bitch is not to be outsmarted. However, there is a way to make the waiting process easier. As hard as it is, it helps to stay busy and positive. Regardless of what you went through in the past, and we have all gone through some evil crap, you cannot let that get you down. No matter what love tragedy happened to you before, never ever take it with you into the present and future. You must let the past go, or else it can destroy you, and leave you stuck in the darkness. Bitterness and anger repels good people away. So please don’t do your ex a favor by staying bitter. You must fight these sad heavy feelings and force yourself to be happy and positive. After all, happiness is a choice!

This reminds me of Natalia’s story. She had been single for years after her boyfriend left her. She thought that he was the love of her life, and they will get married and have a family. Unfortunately, the fairytale died. Carrying a broken heart shattered in a million tiny pieces, she tried to find a new love for some years after, but without much luck. What I admire about Nat is that no matter how difficult her dating life was, she never gave up! She always said, “Gali my time will come, and I will also have true love.” Unbelievable to see how convinced she was, especially after such a devastating breakup. Her 40th birthday arrived, and at 12am, she raised her champagne glass and drank, “To love.” Nat’s two close girlfriends, happily married, were feeling sad for her. They couldn’t understand why such a wonderful woman was still single.

The next morning, hung over and depressed like hell from all the marriage talk, Natalia went to buy some food. She felt and looked like what the cat dragged home last night, with messy hair and puffy eyes, wearing leggings and sneakers. She walked out of the dessert isle with a jar of strawberry jam in her hand, and all of a sudden, BAMM! Some guy bumped into her. She dropped the jar, and the jam splashed all over her shoes, her bag, and the floor looked like thick red blood was splattered all over it. “Jesus! Can’t you watch where the hell you’re………Oh…” She looked up and saw the guy smiling mischievously at her, with a cute guilty look on his face. Half of his jeans were covered in jam as well. They laughed, he apologized, and invited her for dinner to make up for the sweet mess. One thing led to another, they got married, and Nat had her first child now at 42. Amazing right? How did this happen you ask? Well, Natalia believed in love – against all odds!

What works is to be 100% assured that you deserve to be happily in love. You must be completely convinced that true love is out there and will soon be yours. Why the hell should these grey mice you see walking with amazing men, holding hands, have love and not you? If they find a partner, then so can you! Head up and stand tall, knowing that yours is coming too. You must have complete and unconditional faith. Not thinking, “Oh it’s been so long, I give up. I will never find love.” WRONG! Such thoughts will never ever attract love in your direction. Lady Destiny doesn’t like when people feel negative like this. If you don’t feel that you deserve love, then why should it come to you? Change your thoughts immediately, and things around you will change as well. Make a little experiment, and try it out.

Call it craziness or the sixth sense, but I feel that many will meet their life partner this year. A little tip for attracting love: buy yourself a piece of jewelry with rose quartz. Whether it’s a bracelet, ring, necklace or anything else, make sure that the stone touches your skin. Rose quartz increases self-confidence, opens your heart to love, and helps to heal past pain. The best part is that rose quartz attracts new love into your life. I highly recommend wearing this stone everyday. Meanwhile, keep yourself busy. Go out with your friends and dance without looking around for someone to meet, enjoy your hobbies, spend time with your family, discover new food and restaurants, read more, go to galleries, travel, work, get a pet, spend money on yourself, and simply enjoy living – being grateful that you are healthy and alive. And above all, please stay positive and keep the faith, no matter how hard it is! Love will come when you least expect it… I promise you this. It always does.

Why rush to have sex right away?
Why rush to have sex right away? 1354 437 Galia Brener

Gentlemen, this article is mainly for you. Imagine this: you go out with the guys and meet a really fantastic girl. You chat with her for a bit, and manage to charm her enough so that she gives you her number. You go home with a happy feeling because this one has something special about her. Of course you don’t wait 3 days to call her because that’s a stupid rule made up by some player guy – no offense. You call the next day and ask her out. You make a date and take her to a restaurant with delicious food. You talk all night about life, adventures and hobbies. Even a few dreams and goals are exposed. She makes you feel different, and you seem to like her. Being a perfect gentleman, you pay for the dinner – especially on the first date, help her with her coat, and open the door for her to exit the restaurant.

The night is still young, so you offer to go to a bar to prolong the fantastic date, because you don’t want to let her get away just yet. You have a few drinks, and see that you both understand each other. But even more exciting than the mental connection, is the physical one. You notice her luscious lips and bright eyes. She’s telling you a story, while seductively moving her hair to the side, showing the perfect spot of exposed skin for you to kiss and bite on. You feel your pants are getting tighter. You look down at her blouse and notice the top part of her cleavage staring back at you. You envision those beautiful breasts in your hands and her hard nipples in your mouth. You can’t handle these wild thoughts anymore, and you lean over to kiss her. Her lips are soft, and you imagine what her other lips would feel like on your tongue. You ask if she wants to leave the bar and go somewhere more private, like her place.

MISTAKE. What is it with you men trying to score on the first date? If not the first, then definitely the second date. I get letters from so many women complaining that the dates start out so wonderfully, until after a few drinks when the guys try to drag them to their place to have sex. Men, what is the matter? What is the intense rush to kiss, make out or have sex right away? I’m old-fashioned, but maybe I have missed something on the news? Is World War III coming, and I haven’t heard anything about it at all? If there is no war, then what else can explain this mad hustle to get into her panties? Yes you feel the passion, and yes you want to have an Earth-shattering, backward-eyeball-rolling orgasm, but gentlemen, you are on the first date here! Please try to keep that eager curious penis in his pants where he belongs in the beginning. If the penis is so difficult to control, then come home and stroke your friend to sleep, but please tame him in front of your new lady.

Ladies, of course if you are looking for a hot night with a hot man, then this would be irrelevant. However, if you are looking to find a relationship and love, I would advise you to wait before jumping into the bed, onto the kitchen floor, on your carpet or shower with the guy. There is enough time for that later on. Get to know him first, and find out who he really is (read last week’s article). A little hint, if a man doesn’t want to wait a while for you, then he is only after the sex.

Gentlemen, if you are only after sex, then you better tell her that at the very beginning. Maybe she wants the same thing as well. But knowing women quite well, I can tell you that most of us are usually in it for the real deal – the love, best friends, matching sweaters, and that kind of nice cheesy thing. So please do not hurt her, and clear this out first. If you are also looking for love and a relationship, then that’s an even better reason to wait. Show that you respect and value her, and are interested to get to know who she is, how she thinks, what she does, and how she feels. Wake up and smell the coffee, or at least her perfume. She took the time to get ready and make herself look beautiful for you, so admire and appreciate that, instead of ruining that special feeling and those nice new clothes. From personal experience the longer you wait, the better you get to know each other, and the more trust and passion will grow. Then when you finally have her, you will feel how amazing it is to make love to a woman that you really admire and respect. Believe me, it’s worth the wait!

Honestly, in this world of faster than fast, where everything should have already happened yesterday, we have to slow things down. I was speaking to my 90-year-old grandmother last night, and she told me about this thing called “Romance”. She said it was something that was very common back in the days when she was my age. She said that when a gentleman would court his special lady for a few months, he would take her out for dinners and romantic walks by the river. He would come to her door with flowers, and would write her love letters. Eventually after some time passed and the couple got to know each other, the man would take the woman somewhere special and make love to her. Back in my grandmother’s time, making love – or as we now call it: having sex, was something very special. It was something significant which bonded the couple in deep intimacy and trust. Imagine that, a time when giving your body to a man was the most precious thing that a woman could do. I was thinking, wouldn’t it be nice for us to go back to the roots a bit? What if we brought back the courting, and getting to know each other phase? And brought back the romance, patience and respect along with it. Wouldn’t that make dating so much more special and meaningful for us?

Avoid falling in love with a donkey
Avoid falling in love with a donkey 1354 437 Galia Brener

We live in a world where things move quickly, and people do not really take the time to get to know each other well. A couple meets, dates, falls in “love” – or most likely in “lust”, gets into some fights, and then “Next!” They split up because “It didn’t work out” – and around the corner are ten new boys and girls waiting. I ask myself, what ever happened to taking the time and dating, romancing and getting to know each other properly? How well do we actually know the person we suddenly fall so madly in love with? Can we avoid falling for the wrong person and save ourselves the torturous pain?

My friend Ambrosia met a man who she was absolutely sure was the love of her life. On their first date, he took her out a romantic dinner in a hidden away restaurant, on a warm summer evening, and they talked about life under the night sky. It was like a scene out of a movie. Right there and then she fell hopelessly und utterly in love with him. They started dating, and spent every day together. He was charming, romantic, and appeared to be kind and caring. Some time passed, and the first fights started. She closed her eyes on what she thought were the “small things”. Ambrosia convinced herself that these were simply short bad phases that will pass.

Unfortunately month after month, he kept changing towards her. She was beginning to see his true dark nature, but she didn’t want her pink bubble to burst and see the truth. His disrespect towards her grew. He took her for granted, didn’t treat her well, and also began to be verbally abusive. He put her down, and was everything but compassionate and empathetic towards her. What the hell was happening? How could the love of her life, and supposed soulmate turn into such a monster right in front of her eyes? She made him out to be a prince charming in her heart and mind, which was actually a completely different person than he really was! It all ended horribly with a broken heart that was difficult for her to heal. She felt so devastated and betrayed by him. His true nature finally came out, and it was very ugly. She asked me, how could she have been so blind?

The problem was that he didn’t just “become” a mean guy. He was this same guy all along, but managed to somehow blind her with his artificial sparkling personality and charm. There is a Russian saying, “Love is a bitch, and can even make you fall in love with a donkey!” – in other words, love can blind you enough to fall for an asshole. Do you want to spare yourself a broken heart in the future? Here’s what you can do to minimize your chances of meeting a donkey disguised as a prince:

Observe: Listen, and let him speak more at the beginning, especially the first few dates. We women love to talk, and sometimes do not shut up enough, but this is very necessary at the beginning, so you can actually hear what’s going on in his brain. Pay close attention to what and how he says it. Does he talk bad about people, criticize and complain a lot? (Speaking badly about the ex is not a good sign – a gentleman never bad-mouths any women). Does he make nasty jokes at the expense of others? How does he respond to various situations? Does he keep calm, or is he short-tempered, and freaks out quickly? Observe his relationship with his family. Is he kind and caring towards his grandmother, mother, or sister? What are this thoughts and action patterns – is he bossy, judgmental or mean?

Actions speak louder than words: Do his actions match the things he says? Is he trustworthy and reliable when promising something? How does he act around elderly people or animals – is he kind to them? Does he do good deeds? It’s one thing to write sweet things to you, but does he also do these sweet things? Does he call you mostly in the later hours (make sure it’s not a booty call thing for him).
Ask questions: Play Sherlock Holmes (no, not the sex game – that comes later), and dig a bit deeper. Ask him about his childhood, life plans and dreams. Ask some strange and surprising questions simply to see how he reacts. What also helps is no sex right away. I know this sounds super old-fashioned, but the longer you wait to sleep with him, the more you find out about him. Let him romance you first, and make an effort to get you. Things that are acquired “too easily” are never cherished as much as those that one must work and make an effort for.

There are many “small things” that can give you a glimpse into the heart, soul and mind of a man. You must turn your antennae on, and recognize all of his signals, because men give out a lot of information in the first few months. I have been there myself before, and know how important it is to look deeper within someone. Once upon a time I’ve fallen so hard on my ass due to love, and it took a while to join the living again, so please try not to repeat my mistake. Most important, do not lie to yourself. You know those situations when he says or does something strange and your stomach jumps up and tries to escape through your mouth, but you let it go because you want this to work out. Well, if your gut is telling you that something is wrong, then it most likely is. Women are born with a built-in sensor, better known as the “Intuition”. Learn to use this strange Intuition-thing more often to avoid falling in love with the next donkey, no matter how handsome and charming he is. Keep your eyes, ears and heart open. My Mama always says to wear the “Truth Goggles” to clearly see who is standing in front of you.

Can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater?
Can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater? 1354 437 Galia Brener

2014 will be a wonderful year. It feels like it’s a new beginning for many wonderful things. I see that people are becoming aware of their health, relationships, ideologies and even values are changing positively. This is the beginning of a new era where humans are not just taking, but also finally giving back to each other and the world. Lately what has been catching my eye is the fact that many of my friends have been adopting the vegetarian and vegan lifestyle. So what does this mean for relationships? Since this is quite an important change for people, can love exist between a vegan and a meat-eater?

A few weeks ago, my friend Heather met a great guy. She was so happy that after years of dating players, freaks and jerks, this might finally be “The One”! They met for drinks the following weeks and had a wonderful time talking about life, adventures, goals and dreams. Heather was incredibly happy and felt the butterflies flinging themselves wildly in her stomach. On Saturday evening, Mr. Perfect invited her over to his house for dinner. She put her prettiest dress on and floated over to his place, her heart racing and a smile permanently attached to her face.

When Heather arrived, she noticed the effort that he put into this date. The lights were dimmed, the candles flickering, the sensual music vibrating throughout the house, and the table was set to perfection – with delicious salads, dips, breads, and a bottle of wine for the perfect mood. They ate and drank, and Heather felt herself floating away to paradise. Mr. Perfect stood up, and announced, “Now comes the best part of the dinner!” and went into the kitchen. After some minutes she smelled a horrible stench. It was the unmistakable odor of grilled flesh. She walked into the kitchen and saw her strong, handsome man frying two huge pieces of meat. He turned around and flashed her the warmest, heart-melting smile she has ever seen. “Hey baby, look what I made for you. The nicest piece of Wagyu beef I could find in the market!” He put the meat on a plate and cut it in half. The blood oozed grotesquely from of the steak, and the meat was floating amidst the fat and blood on the plate. Heather’s stomach turned and she almost threw up all over him. It was not his fault, and he was just trying to please her in his way. He was so charming, and it felt like his bright blue eyes were burning into her heart. Damn. She was in love with him already. Heather smiled uncomfortably and said, “I forgot to tell you. I’m vegan.”

What the hell should Heather do now, should she stop dating him because he eats meat? Could she ever be together with a person that doesn’t understand her need to protect animals and her own body? How will they cook together? How will she stand those bloody steaks in front of her face again? Stop. Let me introduce you to someone. She’s a mysterious lady that knows no limits. She does what she wants, and when she wants it. She knows no religion, race, size or shape, and she definitely doesn’t care about meat, grains or vegetables! Her name is Love, and she is a tricky bitch.

However mad she is, Love is the most beautiful thing in the world. Thankfully there are ways to deal with her and your food preferences: 1. Communication. 2. Compromise. 3. Tolerance. Talk to your partner about how you feel, what you prefer, what your views are about health, animal rights, cruelty and so on. Be patient while explaining your point of view. Never express yourself with anger or force, otherwise you overstep the boundaries of becoming a fanatic, and may even push your other vegan friends away. It’s about respect and harmony, and not force and anger. After you communicate how you feel, and also hear out their opinion, you can make a compromising step together. How about cooking vegan at home, and eating meat outside? She can go out with the girls and eat all of the meat her heart desires. You can show her your world and cook a delicious vegan meal for her at home, or take her to your favorite vegan restaurant. Gently introduce your partner into your meat-free world, but never ever force them to change their habits and opinions. It will only push them further away from you! Don’t ask your vegan partner to prepare meat for you, because that could make them feel very uncomfortable. Last but not least is tolerance. Discuss this issue, accept each other’s choices, and do not try to change your partner! We live in 2014, and not in the middle ages where they burned witches for eating herbs – pun intended. You want to be accepted for your choices, so do that same with others. Let him eat his sashimi in peace, and get over it. I think that we should not make a big deal about what our partners eat. After all, isn’t it about freedom of choice and respecting that?

True love is not that easy to come by these days, therefore one must be downright insane to let a good person go because of what they eat. We have enough love crap to deal with as it is, so why not relax and just enjoy life and love as it is? We humans are really good at making our own life unnecessarily complicated. Instead of having meat-fights, spend more time kissing, cuddling, making love, enjoying mind-blowing orgasms, holding your lover close to your heart, and building a future together, rather than creating moronic boundaries. The progress is enormous, but there is still enough cruelty to battle within the world right now, so are we really going to allow meat or vegetables to divide us even further?

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