The roses are in their pretty vases, the chocolates are eaten, the bubbles in the leftover champagne have flown away to the next dimension (aliens celebrate the day after), and of course the hangover is that evil one from hell, which forces you to sleep on your office desk. If you went out with the girls – in order to make the pink hearts everywhere look blurrier with every drink – then I congratulate you on being lucky to have such caring and loving friends that are there for better or worse. The good news is… every day is Love Day!
Many are trained to hate Valentine’s Day. I must stay politically correct and just say “Hm.” Unlike some people believe, it is not just a made-up commercial holiday, but rather a very magical and mysterious day, where important events happened in our history.
Let me introduce you to Saint Valentine. This special pure-hearted man lived in the Roman Empire during the year 270 A.D. Emperor Claudius II wanted to recruit more soldiers into his army, but the men were not willing to leave their families and give up their lives in a war. Due to this, Claudius decided to punish everyone, and banish marriages forever! One day, a brave Saint Valentine, secretly started to conduct marriage ceremonies. Claudius II was enraged when he found out about the hidden marriages, and ordered Valentine to spend the rest of his life in jail. Before he was executed, he wrote a letter to a woman, whose eyesight he miraculously healed. This was the very first “Valentine Card” in history! He signed the card: “Your Valentine.” …and then he was executed.
There was a time during the middle ages where blood was used to write intimate letters to show how sincere, deep and true their love really was. Crazy, isn’t it?! Actually it’s not. True Love has no boundaries, and can be expressed in so many different ways. Back then we used to receive blood letters, and now we should consider ourselves lucky if he remembers to bring a box of chocolates? No ladies, sometimes it is up to us to inspire this feeling of romance within our partner. It’s ok to have a little give and take within any relationship. It’s not always the man who should make the effort.
After trying out the blood-writing thing, I realized quite quickly that the letter will have to be short, otherwise it will be quite a “painful” love letter, excuse the pun. Instead of draining your blood, try to greet him at the door with your favorite lingerie underneath your silky kimono, and don’t forget to have the chicken roasting in the oven. A nice bottle of wine, and some sexy French house will do the trick. I prefer Pink Floyd on my killer speakers, but I’m nerdy in that way. Our men are good to us, so why not be wonderful and spoil them in return? Make the evening-after-love-day so fantastic, that next year he might surprise you with a bloody letter, or a beautiful ring. Do not forget, men connect physically, while women connect emotionally. Try to always keep your love life hot and alive!
I think V-Day is quite nice, but we should not rely on such official days to predetermine our moods, expectations, wishes, desires and feelings of love. It might be cheesy, but I really do believe that everyday is Love Day. And why the hell not? It’s not just about having a romantic partner. It’s about our friends, family, pets, buying new shoes, helping the homeless, donating clothing and food… you can encounter love in a different way, everyday! You must be open to it and try to see the love in such places and situations where you would normally never look.
This weekend, try to do something completely selfless and loving. Help a grandma cross the street, call the relative that you haven’t spoken to in a while and make peace, forgive your ex from the depth of your heart (You don’t have to tell him/her – just do it for yourself!), buy a sandwich and give it to a homeless person, whatever you do – make sure it’s an act of kindness. Keep the spirit of Saint Valentine alive. If you want to, do this everyday for 365 days in a row – one act of kindness per day – and see how your life will change for the better!
And most important of all, get rid of those awful controlling expectations! It’s your ego dominating you. I will share with you what I have noticed lately. The less I have been expecting from people, including my boyfriend, the more I have been presented with acts of love and kindness, gifts, positive surprises, caring gestures, etc. Expectations are evil because if they are not fulfilled, they find a way to sneak into your heart a bite a tiny hole into it. They hurt because they can be so deceiving! Therefore, expect nothing, and be positively surprised. This is especially important for Valentine’s Day. So what if you were not celebrating with your sweetheart last night? It doesn’t matter. We have all been single on Valentine’s Day – myself more times than I would like to remember, but who cares? Maybe you will meet your true love next week, and have your own version of Valentine’s Day next month! The point is that you have loving people around you who bring much goodness and positivity into your life. Do not worry, romantic love will come… when you least expect it! Remember my words.