new start

2015 is Over! Evaluate what happened to you…

2015 is Over! Evaluate what happened to you… 960 960 Galia Brener

You’ve had your Christmas fun, and now before the New Year starts, it’s time to get down to business. What is such an urgent task that cannot wait until next year, you ask? The task is the one and only “Self-Inventory”. It sounds quite simple, but actually it can get deep and dirty, with truths exposed and shocking things revealed. But since we are tough guys and gals, and I’m sure that you can handle it, I will share my secret with you. At the end of each year, I make a thorough inventory of my life for that year – from top to bottom, not overlooking any gruesome details. At the end, I see what I have achieved, learned, and what I can do much better next year. This helps me grow as a woman, as a person, and also helps to increase success. However, you must be completely honest with yourself, or else this won’t work for you. So my lovelies, let’s start!


1. Achievements: Let’s start with the nice stuff! This was a damn long year, for some a horrible one, and for others a positive one. But for many, 2015 was a year for the fighting spirit – the Samurai among us. Think back to all of the great things you achieved this year. This includes a new career, having a loving relationship, building your first house, having a child, getting married, overcoming addictions, or whatever wonderful thing you achieved this year, take some time to honor it. Anyone who achieved anything important in 2015 deserves to celebrate, because this bitch of a year was a difficult one, and hence you deserve double recognition for it. You must praise yourself for your success, and feel proud of what you did. I made it a ritual to buy myself a present at the end of the year to celebrate my achievements. Spoiling yourself once in a while is very important, because it helps to remind you of accomplishments and appreciate your own worth.


2. Screw-ups: let’s be honest, we are no angels. I can think back and list a few mistakes I made this year, and so can you. This is where it gets hard because we don’t usually like to admit our mistakes, especially to ourselves! But since you’re brave, and a new year is starting, push yourself to do it. Think back. Have you hurt someone? Played, cheated, stole, backstabbed, told lies, broke hearts and promises, acted disrespectfully or cruelly? Maybe it is yourself that you hurt with something like a bad habit, or allowing others to treat you badly? Maybe you let something slip away that you regret? Send your ego to hell for a moment, and really open yourself up and remember the mistakes you made. Try to acknowledge the wrongs that you did, and see if there is a chance to set things right again. If you are brave enough, you can even contact the person and ask them for forgiveness – it is your Karma after all. If you have already set things right again, then it is time to forgive yourself, forgive the other person, forgive the situation, and move on.


3. Lessons: 2015 was a year of many life lessons for me. Some of them hit me hard and were not so easy to learn, while the others I embraced quite quickly and open-heartedly. Look back and figure out what were your most important lessons of this year. Life threw you these bones, hoping that you will learn and improve on your mistakes. If these lessons are not learned, they will only enter your life again and again, and torture you until you will finally get it. To be honest, I did not learn a lesson in 2012, and the very same thing happened to me at the very same time in 2013 and again in 2015! It was so creepy! You have to realize what life is trying to show you, and make improvements on these things, so that you can grow and move on. Think back, what could you have done better? Take these lessons and use them for your good in 2016, and do things better this time around! And please, do not be angry at your fate – this happened for a reason – to become a better and stronger person!


4. Cleaner: Don’t worry, no killing mafia skills required. Look back at the year, and make an inventory of the people in your life. Be honest to yourself: Is there anyone who has to be cleaned out of your life? Do you have so-called “friends” that are dishonest, don’t care about you, or even worse, jealous of you? What about a partner that does not respect, appreciate, and truly love you, is a cheater or maybe doesn’t want to make a commitment to you? They don’t deserve you and be assured that Lady Karma will take “good” care of them. Let it go, and get rid of them! Sometimes people come into your life for a reason, and once their mission is fulfilled, it is better to send them along their way before they cause more damage in your life. Try to get rid of all toxic people that do you no good before this year ends. Surround yourself only with goodness – and with people that will respect, love, appreciate, honor, and truly love and care for you – and you for them.


The last day before the year ends is a very crucial one. This special time provides us with a moment to become quieter and look deep within ourselves. It’s a chance to reminisce about the funny, lovely and good things that happened, and allows us to learn from our mistakes. It’s an opportunity to make things right again. It’s a chance to say goodbye to the old, and make space for the wonderful new and exciting things to come. If you feel brave enough, try to do this Self-Inventory. It helps me each year, and offers great reassurance. Besides, the best thing about completing the Self-Inventory is the fact that you have another chance right around the corner: New Year, new start!



Destroy the shit before 2015 – Part 1

Destroy the shit before 2015 – Part 1 1354 437 Galia Brener


It’s that time again when the year is winding down and we are confronted with our demons. Some call this the “Holiday Blues”, thinking they might be depressed, sad or lonely, but it’s much deeper and more important than just that. It’s a crucial time that will determine how you step into the next year and which direction your life will go. This is a tough love article, so I might seem somewhat harsh, but it’s for our own good.

Like it or not, a new year is a “reset”. Even if you don’t believe in this, your brain is subconsciously influenced by the thought of a “new start”. If you are honest with yourself, there are some things that you can change and improve about your life. In order to do so, you must first destroy the existing defective base before you build a new structure. No one builds a new luxury building on a rotten old foundation. Never! First everything is destroyed, cleaned out, and then rebuilt.

This week I deal with the points of elimination and destruction of the bad things in your life that drain your happiness. (Next week I will address how to rebuilt a new foundation).

1. Get rid of the toxic people in your life. Cut off anyone that hurts and drains you. They won’t help you grow and will only deplete your goodness with their needy problems and dramas. Be tough even if it seems merciless. You are not their emotional garbage bin so don’t let them dump their shit in your life. Enough!

2. Forgive. This is a tough point, especially if someone has hurt you badly. Regardless if the were friends, exes or colleagues, forgive all these idiots that hurt you. You are doing this for yourself and not for them! You don’t have to speak to them or see them again – but forgiveness allows you to burn away “your” pain and anger, which is blocking you from the good new things.

3. Say NO. We do too many things to be “good” for others, and sometimes even do what we don’t want to. Stop it immediately and don’t hesitate to say NO! Stop going against yourself. By the way, the others will respect you actually more for standing your ground.

4. Nothing is personal. Remember; when people do or say something mean to you, it’s their issue and not yours! Destroy the ability to let others make you feel bad and guilty for no justifiable reason. Don’t take shit from no one, especially when they are trying to deliberately offend or hurt you.

5. Learn to be selfish. We give and give and give so much, but forget ourselves in the process. The love you gave your ex or so-called friend, give that to yourself now. Love yourself truly, because you deserve it. It’s your life so do what’s good for you.

6. Let go. How willing you are to let go of stinky old garbage depends on how much you truly love yourself. Not letting go brings emotional, physical and mental pain and illness. If you really want to be happy and healthy, then you have no choice but to let go of the past and make place for the good things and people in your life.

7. Destroy all bad habits. Easier said than done? No. If you truly want to be healthy and not die, then you can do it. It’s all about willpower, making that “1 decision” and sticking to it! Stop smoking. Stop taking drugs. Stop drinking alcohol excessively (only in moderation). Stop eating damaging food. If you can’t do it alone, then get external help and stop hurting yourself.

8. Throw away all the junk you don’t need. Like the bad people that collect dust in your life, so do the things that you don’t need. I hate going into homes that are cluttered with “stuff” because I can’t breathe there. Your home reflects your inner self, so why block yourself with useless things? Take a big garbage bag on the weekend, go from room to room, throw away the small crap and destroy the clutter. Keep it simple. Give the clothing and things you don’t need to charity.

Like my Papa always tells me, “Make a solid firm decision and stick to it. Going back and forth will only bring more pain and insecurity.” Some of these 8 points may sound tough, but are necessary in order to move into a better life and a happier new year. We must never stop to work on ourselves and develop for the better. We have this one life, so why deprive ourselves of complete happiness?

Next week comes part 2 about rebuilding the good after the destruction of the bad.

To be continued …

Bye bye old, hello new!

Bye bye old, hello new! 1354 437 Galia Brener

There are a few days left before the year ends, which leaves you with some time to decide: which people, situations, bad habits, things, emotions and hurts you must clean out of your life in order to make space for the new wonderful things that shall happen next year! Let’s call it Feng Shui-ing your life for happiness!

If you are carrying baggage with you from the past or present; such as a very painful breakup, a love that no longer works, your job suddenly gone, a friend that has betrayed you, or other unfortunate situations, now is the perfect time to work on it, let it go and move on. You deserve to be happy! It’s time to stop torturing yourself and open up to the glorious opportunities that life has in store for you!

In order to allow this renewal to come into your life, you must make a cut with the past. You must deal with these issues, because if you don’t, they will come back to haunt you. Face and feel the emotions: anger, hurt, sadness, fear. Cry your heart out. Scream. Punch your pillow – let it all out! Give yourself a certain timeframe where you grieve, after that, it’s time for the healing to begin. If you stay in the grieving phase for too long, you will not recover properly. This takes courage and strength. Save yourself, or else you will be broken for a very long time!

Go through your flat and throw out anything that reminds you of the past, which you no longer need. Why keep that concert ticket that you both went to? It will only hurt you over and over every time you see it. Make space for the new! Don’t keep your flat full of junk. Every time you get rid of one more useless thing, you feel much lighter, and the air around you will be easier to breath. If you do not like to throw out pictures, then at least put them in a box or burn them onto a DVD, and take them down to the cellar. I know this is super hard, but you must delete all photos of you and your ex from your phone and computer. You cannot afford to get hurt every time you look at them. It’s emotional suicide. Do not open the wound over and over again. Be strong and love yourself.

Forgive. That’s the only way to truly move on. Forgive your boss for firing you. Forgive your body for hurting inside. Forgive your ex for betraying you. Most importantly, forgive yourself. You must forgive yourself for allowing the hurt to affect you so hard, for not seeing the truth earlier, for allowing others to treat you badly, for thinking that you did something to destroy the relationship, etc. If you are the one that has done the wrong, contact that person, apologize and ask for forgiveness. Be strong, and face your mistakes.

Remind yourself of the bad stuff. You hated the hours of your job, your boss was never on your side, and did he make you feel worthless or stupid? Remember the times you actually got flowers from your partner/ex, not so often? Did he really appreciate you? No. If you are honest with yourself, he took you and your love for granted. Are they worth the pain you are suffering from now? Open your eyes and heart and look at the reality of the situation! Thank God that you got away from it all! You deserve so much better!

My friend Claudia lost her job and biggest love at the same time. When they met, she had a good job. She took him to wonderful events, and they had so much fun because of her initiative. She brought life and love into his life. A love he never knew before. Even her family took better care of him than his own did. When he was ill, she was always by his side. She was very loyal, and adored him more than anything else on the planet. As soon as her job was gone, he ran away, fearing that she will not find stability anymore. He thought that he helped her by pushing her everyday with finding-a-job-questions, but it was the wrong kind of “help”. She needed him to have unconditional faith in her! But he didn’t truly believe in her, and was not by her side when she needed him most! He didn’t offer to take care of her until she finds a new job, because he was afraid she would live on his costs and use him – although she would never allow this to happen because she was sure that she will find a job soon! He simply betrayed her, in a very ugly, disgusting way. He showed his true face. Funny thing, after they split up, she almost immediately got a fabulous well-paying job! Claudia told me that this was an important test for their love. As soon as the first big crisis hit, he revealed his weakness and ran away. Then the amazing job came. The Gods showed her his real face and true nature. He failed the test big time! Poor Claudia’s heart was completely shattered into a million tiny pieces. He simply shut her out of his life, killed the love, and became a stranger within one bloody week! How could any “normal” human being do such a thing after the love they shared? Love-blinded Claudia tried to make compromises to save the relationship, but he didn’t even make a single step towards reconciliation! He already knows that he made a huge mistake, which he will regret for his entire life. No other woman will love him so truly and unconditionally! I told her that she must be happy that this happened. Who needs such a weak betraying jerk in their life?! She is moving on and meeting fabulous handsome men that appreciate her for who she is.

As you see dear ladies and gentlemen, we have all been there, and experienced awful things. You’re not alone. If you want to be happy again, clean up the mess in your life and move on. Be strong and let go of that garbage. That’s exactly what it is: dirty smelly disgusting garbage, which you do not need! These people never deserved you. Open up your heart and soul to the new opportunities that life wants to give you. So much goodness is waiting for you! In 3 days it’s a new year. Now is your chance to start the year with strength and positivity! Have mercy and love yourself.

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