body language

6 Steps for Classy Flirting

6 Steps for Classy Flirting 1080 530 Galia Brener

I like to observe people all around me. Last week I was on the train and saw a pretty young lady sitting not too far away from me. As the train reached the Frankfurt main station, a handsome man walked in and sat down across from her. I knew right away that I will get a nice article from this scenario.

Flirting varies from person to person. Some are simply born with the talent to flirt and charm, some feel awkward doing it, some think it’s cheap, while others are flirt-o-holics and cannot live without it. So what’s the secret to flirting and how is it done in a classy way with the best results?

Back to my train-spying-romance-story. I looked closely at the woman, and noticed that her eyes brightened when she saw him. She straightened her posture and tried to make herself more alluring to him. He didn’t notice a thing. She glanced at him and looked away. The ride was quite long, so she did that many times, but the guy still had no clue. After a few more attempts, she gave up her subtleness and just gawked shamelessly at him. She arched her back, placed a half smile on her lips, and looked fiercely into his eyes without blinking! She looked wild and hungry, like in a cannibal-cloud-nine-bath-salts kind of way. I was watching them, entertained out of my mind – who needs a movie when you have freak shows all over the city? She tried to bat her eyelashes at him – but instead of being sexy, it looked like she was trying to blink her own eyelid away, opening her eyes wider each time. The guy was squirming very uncomfortably in his seat by now. Eventually her “flirting” technique scared the hell out of him, so he got up and walked quickly away. So ladies and gentlemen, now that we know the wrong way to flirt, let’s see how we can do it the right way.

1. The Eye Contact: This is the most important aspect of the flirt-system! What usually works for me is first a quick glance in his direction. If he sends you a glance back, lock eyes for a moment and look away. Continue doing that for a few times, each time locking eyes for longer periods of time. I wouldn’t recommend looking over too often. Besides, you will feel and see if he’s interested or not.

2. The Smile: After the eye contact, comes your time to shine – beam him/her with a warm and welcoming smile, but please don’t overdo it. We don’t want to come across as psychopaths – a.k.a. – Train Girl. A genuine smile is the sexiest thing and guy or girl can wear, because it shows happiness. Happy people are very attractive. As with the first step, look and smile a few times. If s/he smiles back, you’re in! If not, don’t waste your time because they are most likely not interested.

3. The Approach: This one is more for the guys. I’m a bit of an old fashioned girl and don’t approach men first. I feel that if I have sent out the right signals, topped it off with a warm lovely smile, and if he’s interested, he will approach me. Here comes the best part gentlemen – all you have to do is walk over, smile and say hello. Offer her a drink and introduce yourself. No pick up lines, no playing too cool, no wise guy remarks. Just be sincere, charming, warm and friendly. It’s really as easy as that. If this doesn’t work, then move on – nothing lost.

4. Body Language: Do not cross your arms when talking to him/her. Do not lean away from the person – instead – lean in towards them in the conversation. What works well is to imitate the other person’s body language, because that means you are in sync. Don’t hold out on the smiles or act too serious. Be open and relaxed. Make sure you have a good posture and don’t slouch.

5. Be Charming: Ask him or her questions, and show that you are interested in what they have to say – but don’t fake it. Be genuine, and only show interest if it’s there. When talking, a gentle touch on the arm, or a playful push and laugh is always a nice way to create subtle closeness. Don’t brag about how great your career is, or how cool your friends think you are. No one likes show-offs. Respect the other person and show your good manners. Making an honest compliment works really well. Everyone likes to hear something nice about themselves, but don’t get too personal or sexual right away.

6. Most Important – Lower Your Expectations: If you meet someone that you really like, do not start dreaming right away that this could be the one and put pressure on yourself. Men and women smell desperation and neediness – and this is not the impression you want to leave. So if it goes well, exchange numbers and take it from there. I highly recommended going slow at the beginning.

Flirting is a nice way to increase your self-esteem and confirm to yourself that you are attractive to others. It’s a way of saying to yourself, “I still have the touch.” Flirting is great for getting to know someone who has caught your eye and improving your communication skills. It’s also a great energy booster, and puts you in a positive mood. However, if someone is clearly not responding to your flirting, accept that they are not that into you and walk away. Don’t continue, thinking that they are simply playing hard to get. You will see and feel when it’s not working out. Not everyone is meant to be for everyone – that would be too boring. Your turn will come. Do not let anyone bring you down, and have faith that you deserve true love, and know that you will have it. Know your worth, and always respect yourself – if you do, so will others! Go out there and enjoy a nice evening of flirting.

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Men love high heels

Men love high heels 1354 437 Galia Brener
This article is feminist-friendly and unfriendly. From the one side, I will describe how heels can win the attention of a man, but on the other side, I will also describe that heels change the way a woman walks and behaves – which does a lot to increase her self confidence. Of course this in return creates strength and love for herself. Who would have thought that high heels could do so much?

As you know, I am always researching for you ladies, and have asked my male friends this same question. Do men like high heels? Yes! Most of the men screamed the answer out right away. Men love it when a woman wears high heels. The best answer I had from a male friend was that he feels privileged and honored when his woman takes the time to make herself look sexy for him, and also wears high heels when they go out. He says it shows that she tries to make an effort for her man to stay sensual and attractive, and not let herself go. This is a very important aspect for men – that their women take good care of themselves and not get sloppy and take that for granted. After all girls, we also don’t want a man who only sits on the couch, drinks beer and grows a huge belly, right? High heels were definitely the first thing the men mentioned to me that they absolutely love when a woman wears. And I don’t mean those 5 cm comfy office pumps. I’m referring to the proper heels that give your back that elegant arch, and make you walk like a cat.

I speak for myself, and my girlfriends when I say that wearing high heels when going out gives you a completely different charisma and radiance. First it affects how you walk, how you position your body and move your hips. I feel much sexier when I go out in heels. They make my legs look longer and thinner, and like it or not, this automatically increases the self-confidence. When I wear my favorite heels, even with an old pair of jeans, I feel like a leopard moving seductively across the dance floor or restaurant. It makes me feel more feminine and powerful. This gives a woman the feeling of assurance, strength and the ability to conquer the world or any man around her. Sure I don’t mean that you must wear heels all day long, that’s quite unhealthy, but for those special occasions when going out, why not give it a try and see if you notice a difference in your body language and assertiveness? I know women that as soon as they have their power heels on, they transform from the sweet girl next door to a seductive femme fatale! That’s how much of a difference having those centimeters underneath your feet can make. Perhaps it’s about feeling taller, more elegant and powerful. I don’t know what it is, but it’s definitely a brilliant mind trick.

Anna’s boyfriend broke up with her a few months ago. She was heartbroken and didn’t know how to overcome the pain. So what did we, her good friends do? We got her a makeover, and she changed everything. Her hair length and color, we bought her a few new outfits, some nice accessories, and I got her a new pair of nice shoes. These were her first 10cm heels. She has never felt the need to wear these silly things before. She didn’t see the point of suffering and having painful feet just to look sexy. But this one night I forced her to wear them. We went out, and who was the first man that saw her and dropped his jaw on the floor? Her ex. Standing 2 meters away from us at the bar, he couldn’t believe it was his “Ordinary-plain-Anna” as he once called her! What a horrible thing to say. Thankfully she looked absolutely stunning that evening. He looked down at her feet and couldn’t get his eyes off her legs. He would have never guessed that the “plain” Anna is such a drop-dead gorgeous woman. He took her for granted, and a simple pair of high heels showed him how seductive she can be. He is not the nicest person I know, but I will admit that both let themselves go in the relationship. Ladies, please make an effort for yourself and your partner to look your best, like when you first met. There is nothing wrong with a bit of makeup, heels and sports.

Last but not least, and especially in longer relationships, the magic of heels cannot be dismissed – particularly with sex! I’m always saying how important it is to keep the sex in the relationship alive, fresh and interesting. What men really like are high heels in bed. Ladies, buy a pair of sexy high heels that you only wear at home, and not outside. This way they always stay clean, and you can wear them in bed. Make it a part of your sex toy collection, and call them your special “Bed shoes”. I guarantee you that if you surprise your man with lingerie and high heels on in bed, he will grab you and make love to you right there and then! Such a small thing can ignite the fire again. Men want their women to make them feel special. A little effort can go a long way. Every woman has a seductive wild cat hidden inside of her. Mine comes out to play when my high heels are on. It activates my vamp posture and I go into “seduction mode”. If you can’t walk well in the heels at the beginning, don’t worry; it’s all about practice. Get them a few days before and wear them around the house to get used to the feeling. Next time you have a horrible pair of ballerinas in your hand at the shoe store, why not replace them with a beautiful pair of high heels? Make a little experiment and see what happens.

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