Finally I was able to do the “guy-walk” in this cowboy style that one always sees in wild-west movies. Legs spread apart, knees bent, shoulders wide, and ready to attack. I simply walked up to Ex Nr. 1, punched him as hard as I could, and got this sucker down on his knees. I assumed that his nose was broken because he was holding it with blood gushing out from all sides. The bastard had tears in his eyes. I had the appearance of a man, so he did not know who I am. He looked up at me, totally confused and bewildered. I looked pitifully at him and said, “No matter what you do, you will never escape. Karma will always find you, and bite you in the ass. This is for the women that you hurt in your past.” and I walked away. His few pathetic tears did not compare to the oceans that I cried for him.
Without hesitating, I did the same thing with Ex Nr. 2. Noses were punched, blood was lost, and karmas were set straight. After a hard day’s work of punching the Exes, it was time to eat an oversized burger, and try to attempt a loud male burp. That was quite enjoyable. As the sun was setting, I sat down to enjoy a large glass of beer outside. The women could not keep their eyes off of me! Could it possibly be this easy being a man?
As I was about to pay, a charming young woman sat down at the table beside me. She was in her beginning 30s, had shoulder-length blonde hair, striking turquoise eyes, and a characteristic bump on her nose. She smiled briefly at me and ordered a bloody mary. When her drink arrived, she lit up a slim cigarette, and smoked it slowly, looking dreamily onto the street. Her lips were full and sensual. I could smell her sweet perfume. It felt so thrilling being a man! I felt a tightening sensation in my pants. The penis really does have a mind of its own. When he wants to have fun, he is quite convincing – doing everything he can to get his target, slide under the sheets, get into the woman, release his juice, and fall asleep again. Yes, the glamorous life of the penis!
Suddenly I felt dizzy because it seemed as if all of the blood I had was rushing – rather quickly – into my new best friend, my spicy sausage. Her smell was filling up my lungs, and dominating my brain. I had to find out who she was. I turned to her and said, “Hello, how are you doing?” her face lit up with a smile, and she answered, “Carine”. We sat outside of the bar for two hours, talking about life and our funny adventures. She laughed at my joked and once in a while, innocently touched my arm. I wanted to get her into bed and rip the clothing off her body, but I didn’t know how to be a man! My penis was starting to swear at me. He was quite rude! But I managed to shut him up every time he forced himself to be noticed. This little/big guy is not always that easy to control. But being a woman in a man’s body, I blackmailed him telepathically, and he obeyed my commands. All of a sudden Carine got up, grabbed my hand and pulled me off my chair. She said that we were going to her flat. I did not argue, I just followed, curious as hell to see what it feels like to have sex as a man.
Her flat was beautiful, but somewhat strange. The curtains, furniture, decoration, carpet, wooden floor, pictures, books, candles, etc. were all white. I have never seen anything so minimalistic and mysterious before. It was like being in a dream. Was I dreaming? Was Carine real? Was I about to have sex with a woman? She went to slip into something more comfortable. I kept on adjusting my package. Damn those two round hanging penis extensions. They need to be adjusted quite often, and always get in the way. I was starting to miss the extra space and freedom between my legs!
Carine came back into the living room, half naked, hair messy and wild, with a huge smile of her face and two large glasses of wine. She put the glasses aside and sat on my lap, rubbing her behind on my crotch. She undressed me, and almost ripped my shirt off. She opened her eyes wide, telling me how big I was. She pushed her panties to the side and sat on me. She arched her back, pushed out her breasts towards me, squeezed her muscles in all the right places, and enjoyed the ride. I felt like I was shot out of this galaxy. Such an intense, yet foreign feeling. Every nerve in my body was awake. I forgot where I was, and what my name was. I was inside of a woman! That was just crazy! Carine was rotating her hips, throwing her hair all around, like a wild animal that broke out of the zoo. I grabbed her from behind and pulled her closer towards me. I had to feel the full length of my penis wrapped around in magic. We tried quite a few positions, tied our eyes, hands, untied everything again, and I felt the familiar shiver down my spine. I was so close. I felt the tingling hotness inside. The rocket-launch feeling again. 3..2..1. Lift off!! I was blown away! My entire body was shaking! The bed was wet all around her. The sex was phenomenal!
I woke up with the sun shining on my face. I was in my own bed. I looked under the blanket. Oh the joy! How I missed my lovely girl, and perky breasts! No more hairy feet. No more shifting of any balls. I felt so small and light. It was wonderful! Being a man is interesting, but nothing beats being a woman!
The next week, I met my girls at the Fressgassfest. One of them brought their friend along. It was Carine. We ordered a large bottle of cold prosecco, and she told us about a tall handsome asshole she met the week before. They had a special evening, but the bastard never called. I looked at her with an amused smile on my face, and said, “Carine, maybe this guy simply disappeared from the Earth?” She gave me an annoyed look and continued her story. I took a puff from my cigarette, looking dreamily away, and wondered, if I ever told my story, would they think I’ve gone insane? Yet after all, I knew where all of Carine’s hidden beauty marks were. Including her tattoo… in a very special place.